Open mind open heart

Spent last week living in a field
2nd year running
amazing singing/voice camp

This year beautiful Devon sun
Plungepool in the Holy brook
Compost loos
Bucket hot showers
cooking for each other
Campfire
Organic food
15 beautiful racehorses regularly playing
Thundering up and down the next field
Makes yr hair stand on end
Good friends
Face painting
Harmony singing
Chanting
Busking
Blues
Poetry

amazing creative
Inspiring
Encouraging

So safe you have to do something
Taking a risk becomes the thing to do

all obstacles are removed
No excuses

Writing 15 songs since
Learning how to write a song
last camp
This year became more
About performing them live
Singing and playing
Live infront of the other 89
Singers, non singers,musicians,
Children, friends, teachers
Such a fab environment

Seems my path is taking 2 strands
At the moment
Faith and singing, songwriting, performing
Its also about teaching others

I need to be taught how to....

Can feel it will all come together at somepoint
But not sure how
Yet its exciting
All the preparation

Just found out there is one place left on a leaders
Singing workshop its beem suggested i go on

Creating community choir,
accessible for all
Nothing to do with church singing
Everyone can sing,
No need to read music
if you can speak you can sing :-)

If you told be 13 months ago i would be doing
All this id have said yr bonkers!

Oh well
Openmind
Opem heart
Anylengths
Having fun :-)

Missing camp!!

what its like today

How you all doing today? Done anything interesting? I've been planning open mic, live performance since August... And never felt confident... Tnite i spent eve in a pub in Basildon... Open mic, which is good kareoke !!

Going in pub alone, didnt phase me, sat for a while, felt uncomfortable taking up a big table with just me... And as everyone borrowed chairs to add to their tables, i could see myself ending up at a big table alone with just my chair left with me on it and all other tables full... Are u Picturing it? So i went and stood at the bar. See this isnt a problem, cos my motive for goin was to check out open mic, and eventually sing?! (not hangnaround the bar)

By the way the slops trays still smell rank as do the beer towels :-) but suppose it was kindof nice being in a friendly atmosphere, no nutters, barmaid was friendly and encouraging, even suggested most people have a few drinka before they got up... I wondered just how many cokes and cups of tea i would need :-) after the guy doin the sounds, announced he is an agent and some of his acts kindly follow him around and start the evening off, i decided to just listen for abit. They were really good, i am wondering how they know the key, and it became apparant, he knows what key they sing in (cos theyre his acts) and they are experienced singers.

Yeh i was intimidated!! And too afraid to get up. They even tried out new songs, got them wrong, missed notes words, still sounded good tho. Pride won this eve... This eve! Was impressed i could order a cuppa tea at 9.30pm in pub :-) barmaid told me twice they do kareoke, all kinds!! On a wednesday, so come back wednesday.. Cant this week...

Interestingly to me at one point my coke tasted like vodka and coke... Yet it wasnt. I was surrounded by sights, smells and sounds of king alcohol, yet At no point did i find the stuff interesting. I left before last orders...!

In big book it says we will be placed in a position of neutrality (around alcohol) we will be neither cocky or afraid (around alcohol) this comes automatically p84/85 http://www.whytehouse.com/big_book_search/aspbook/ch6p85.asp?word=Cocky

So it works....

I had to avoid drinking places, go to meetings directly mirroring my drinking times, not go down the booze aisles in supermarkets, avoid supermarkets, off licences, cornershops, and live on takeways for ages, because the damn stuff used to shout at me... Buy me buy me. Sitting in bars on my hands drinking coke slowly was not fun.

Steps work, loving higher power provides us with the grace... In otherwords we deserve another chance at doing it different... In AA we are cut the slack we need to have it all turned around. Good things come :-)

Having said all that, i am still not entirely sure what HP is preparing me for... He moved me to one of the most exhibitionist counties in the UK...

I am being given microphones, a voice and front of stage more frequently and with ease than i would have thought possible... Who knows whats in the plan.

this county is a place to walk round with your skirt tucked in yr pants and no one bats an eyelid. Come to think of it they Are that Short ya may not tell anyway!!

I am not being intolerent... i am loving living here, am by the sea, learning how to be as outspoken and Cat off eastenders... Coming out of my shell... And it hurts... And i dont always want to do whats in front of me, the right things... Responsible, like eating and changing my bed... Dusting... Turning up for work, the satisfactory none dramatic stuff (yawn) responsible :-) But i wouldnt want to miss what comin :-) its all part of recovery

Ps. Smooth and safe drivin this evening :-)

Cost me £2.80 for tea and a coke and experience...

More fun... and sun - thank you God...

Was joking friday evening that
I had asked for sun
2.30 on saturday
as thats when I planned to meet up
with friends in the park
inspite of the wet forecast
I said yeh I had had a word
and it would be sunny
over St James Park
even if it wasnt everywhere else...
went home and asked for forgiveness
self righteousness is not cool!

anyway it rained most of saturday morning
and stopped around lunch
at exactly 2.30 the sun came out at home
I was running late...
I had no faith that it would be sunny in the park
it looked very dark over that way
but whatever ? contingency plans had been made

It rained on the way while I was on the train
it had stopped by the time I got off
and by the time I got to park
the sun was out
and drying up the rain
the band were playing in the park
people were out
and it just got warner and warmer...

was lovely seeing friends
and as usuall not enough time
went to cinema
and then pizza after
really fun time

Today I am really tired
and couldnt drag myself out to the gym
more jokes about my age and emails etc

Life good dudes
its rained all day here
lokks like I got my birthday present from God
yesterday, he gave me sunshine in the park
its the free stuff that I love
in the place I love

I am having far too much fun
I am grateful
pass me the stick!

Today I lerned to play this


Robbie Williams - Come undone Chords

at last serious studying Hoo "frikkin" rah - the vinegar question, cooking, eating, yoga and of course playing around!!

learning this is a good distraction
this weekend

Donovan Leitch this is lovely :)


enjoy

Yoga today, I am impressed
she took blocks away from me today
which means I have improved
on an asana that I struggled with for ages!
and even left out
it just shows to keep on with everything else
and eventually an area I struggle with
will start to become easier
keep on and eventually progress
will be made, even if its just an inch
or a little less of a grimace whilst attempting it!
instead of giving up because I cant do it all 1st time
this asana I started trying a year ago
Give time time as they say!
its true

Gods time not mine

The Vinegar debate is over for now
thank you for your comments
I am glad I asked
I'll let you know how I get on


back to my notes! big sigh