My imagination is well and truly on fire!! Clearly

We have shown how we got out from under.
You say, "Yes, I’m willing.
But am I to be consigned to a life
where I shall be stupid, boring and glum,
like some righteous people I see?
I know I must get along without liquor,
but how can I? Have you a sufficient substitute?"
Yes, there is a substitute and it is vastly more
than that. It is a fellowship in Alcoholics Anonymous.
There you will find release from care, boredom and worry.
Your imagination will be fired. Life will mean something at last.
The most satisfactory years of your existence lie ahead. P152

Its true :-)

AA Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous

Prison Service - will I fit ?

Have been "thinking" about doing prison service

.....since I was 2 years sober

That was nearly 2 years ago!!


This week I got the prison contacts from

our intergroup service workshop

I have signed up for a chair in a local prison next month

At a meeting the next day they wanted people to do

chairs in another prison... I put my name down

There are no coincidences


Service keeps me sober & gives me inner strength

Staying sober & doing service gives me opportunities

get out of my Comfort Zone

grow into new comfort zones

Natural progressions

Growth with a real purpose P77

Tradition 5


Our real purpose is to fit ourselves to be of maximum

service to God and the people about us. P77

How will I know where I fit ? By giving it a go

Getting into the middle of the AA bed

I wont know if I fit til I get in or out and about

with the people about us

Your job now is to be at the place where you may

be of maximum helpfulness to others, so never

hesitate to go anywhere if you can be helpful. p102

No hesitation this week

Get In There!!

AA Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous

I am grateful..... for Living Sober

am sober
I am well
am happy
am unafraid
am clean
I have a great haircut
I cleaned my teeth
had a bath
clean clothes
I have a conscious contact with God
I have a sponsor
a home group
having a commitment in my home group
did a full days work
got a call from a sponsee
AA literature
I am not God
There are no rules
did service

had 3 meals (in the right order)
promptly banked a cheque (which received only today)
Took a walk along the River Thames in the sun
Listened to my sponsor
Prayer
excersized restraint of tongue and pen
Didnt get tied up in someones drama
Didnt give advice
Prayed lots

a letter from my gran
a pack arriving for a course
freedom of choice
having an openmind
freedom from paralysing fear
that I can have a lay in tomorrow
Freedom from alcohol
Freedom from obsession
The speed of which I let go is becoming faster
Having fun
Laughing
not picking up a cigarette
having a mental defense

Enjoying my guitar
Having a fab teacher, with a sense of humour
Practical, hands on learning
can now play Chasing Cars - Snow Patrol
and others
Have to sing along to get the rhythm
having to practice most days to keep up
(Step4 gave me this discipline)
try to do a bit each day
even when you want to throw it out the window
even when my fingers are all thumbs
(step 4 & 10 hammered home this discipline)
Singing!? my singing sounds well in tune
(in my opinion ha ha)
Keep on Keeping on

Planned a lay in tomorrow
Recovery Rocks dudes!!
Bring it on

AA's Living Sober is not one of my most read AA books
However, I let go of an old idea lastnight
Seriously bent its spine and read of a few chapters
It has some really good practical suggestions
Suggested to sponsee - look out for it at next meeting

Get over yourself

Glad I was taking someone newer than me
It was their first AA dance
My second
anyway my fears were nothing compared to theirs!!

Got there and did a meeting
Great chair... perfect for the dance
"everyones scared about what everyone thinks of them"
"Everyones pride kicks in"
"Everyone feels like a woodentop dancing sober"
Its true AA has given me the tools to deal with everything
everything it seems except to get straight on the dance floor!!

Once I knew everyone feels like me, its was easy
Left the meeting, grabbed my friend
And boogied on down until it closed
Have to say
the music was not my taste
my dancing style was not that flamboyant
infact simple steps really
but it was me, what i could do

i spent most of the evening watching how everyone else
(not taking inventory, just seeing how it works)
how they were doing it
i noticed most people were just doing their own thing
no real fancy dancing
no one really in the groove
most people also just doing simple steps

most people were just like me
same old....
just in your own time, in your own way
there were a few minutes when...
I danced like no one was watching... now thats a miracle
If you shut your eyes its easy

So once again
turning up and seeing what happens
worked again

Woke up this morning
Telly still on, central heating on
I had fell asleep knackered last night
Whe I tried to get out of bed
I Couldnt move, every muscle ached

I really need to get out more!!!

I had such a good time
Didnt sit down once or stand on the edge
No standing with my back to the wall
no envy of those on the dance floor
yeh I have moved on, yeah grew abit last night

first sober AA dance A BAD NIGHT
second sober AA dance YAY!!
PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

lesson is
as always
Keep coming back
it gets better

PS the other person, really had a great time
danced like no one was watching
and couldnt believe what a cheap night out it was!!
(obviously my excellent company did it :-)

I really believed it would never work for me...

and yet
last night my sponsor said...
I think its about time you looked at sponsoring!!!!
Oh my God
Its a miracle
I love being wrong

Even last year trudging through a step 5
of the previous year
I had thoughts of a conspiracy theory
that I would never get to this point
that something else would happen
and i would have to start again
or i would drink or something!?!?

Now I am very grateful
I keep welling up, tears of gratitude
I feel responsible
I also feel that I have a responsibility
I also also feel willing

God has never given me more than I can handle

Ps Going to an AA dance tonight,
one of those growth things
doing something I dont want to do
........just for excersize (see Just for today card)
and for fun!! no-one said I have to dance
just turn up and see what happens

Social life in and out of AA is maxed out
THIS IS A GIFT, NOT A PROBLEM
having to say no to stuff is essential
hectic is not something that feels comfortable
and its not what was passed on to me
watching the clock prevents me staying in the moment
learning to let go of social opportunities
and trust that more will come along
Step 3 stuff

so am looking at balance
and learning how to say, I have to leave now
... and then leaving

Also TRYING to bed early more regularly
YES THAT OLD CHESTNUT
result is, am waking up a little earlier
(this doesnt mean that I get out of bed
just means i wake earlier)
even getting cuppa tea and breakfast before leaving home
instead of when i get to work!!

some progress being made
am happy with that

ps. just had a thought, which could be mistaken as quite innocent
"i need to eat before i go out" (dancing Saturday night)
or its just proof that my old thinking
crops up at the strangest of moments haha
I will eat anyway :-) and pray

Mother nature is amazing

This is my first attempt at posting a picture on my blog, its an African penguin, taken recently on Robben Island, South Africa. I really did get this close, well 6 feet away, it was laying under a walkway out of the sun.

And this is on top of Table Mountain at sunset. Breathtaking.

Link for these & other World Heritage Sites

http://whc.unesco.org/en/list

Faith Without Works is Dead P14,P76, P88

Another lesson

Went away two weeks
make amends
take a holiday

read 3 books
(this is huge progress, as could read a paragraph
a few years ago, without mind wandering)
lots of prayer
lots of meditation
developing that vital sixth sense P85
all moving in the right direction

BUT self obsession kicked in after about 10days
Went to a meeting, shared
talked after with someone new
i felt, lighter

came back did usual
extra meetings, on the "hunt" for new people
gave lots away
now I feel like nothings touching me

Have moved up a gear
wings have streamlined

While away...
Had the Faith, did the prayer, meditation
Lots of answers came, as they tend too nowadays
But No-one to give it away to
no purpose...
I forgot Tradition 5 & Preamble

Lesson is, I did nothing "wrong"
I simply learned a truth by experiencing BOTH
Faith without works is dead P14, P76, P88
and Faith with works is very much alive
Nothing is in the big book by accident
Its in the book for a reason
Its NO coincidence its in there 3 times
Everything in the book was written by recovered/ing
for recovering alcoholics

To duplicate, with such backing, what we have accomplished is only a matter of willingness, patience and labor. P163

Now I know

Keep on Keeping on

page refs Big Book Alcolholics Anonymous

Ps I had the best holiday
which included
24hours away with my brother
this included
Table Mountain
Robben Island
the brother time was so special
we have never, ever been away just the two of us
This was such a gift

the gifts just keep coming
Thank you

We are sure.....

We are sure God wants us to be happy, joyous, and free
P133

Its true
have been blessed with a happy heart

Thank you

Amends, well over half way through

before I started them, i felt like just amazing
transformation

now I feel stronger INSIDE
Like there are NO LIMITS
Freedom

You said over and over and over and over that
"It doesnt say anywhere in the AA literature that it works for everyone except me"

how long ago was that ?

you told me the truth

Blind faith has turned into an unshakeable Faith

What seemed at first a flimsy reed, has proved
to be the loving and powerful hand of God.
A new life has been given us or, if you prefer,
a design for living that really works.
P28

Honesty willingness and openmindedness

No longer spending time in the brace position, waiting for the plane crash!!

Good night

page refs - Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous

Analysis Paralysis v First things First

Whenever my sponsor tells me am analysing
My response is... well you did ask me how I am!!
I wouldnt have said if you hadnt asked
Thankfully it doesnt happen so much nowadays
(Usually when I have balked at inventory for a few days)

I posted not long ago
I have a tendency to blog instead of Step10 & pray
Even though the results of Step10 & prayer
Inventory, prayer and helping others is the X factor
Sharing my will and my life on a blog is not going to keep
me from alcoholic death or insanity

Taking Daily inventory
Prayer
Improving my conscious contact
and immersing my physical, mental self into step 9
Doing, not thinking

Last night I surrendered my will & my impatience over
Taken sponsors suggestion on trust re step 9
Had a nightmare in the night!!

Nightmares
Every single step, when i surrender to it
i mean every step, when i let go of predicting, manipulating
accept & just do, see what happens, keep it simple
I have a nightmares for little while

Nowadays I am grateful for them
For me its evidence I am in surrender mode
Honest, willing and openminded
For me I see it now as my UNconscious
processing the change, my mind still works even when I am asleep
Even if consciously I am doing the right things, prayer, inventory
to combat fear.... when I am asleep, I am powerless

This is a cunning baffling powerful illness
It absolutely does not want me to take this step
It knows its another step away from a drink
Not another step towards

Nightmares, unmanageability, physically sick
yeah I'll start the step when am feeling better!!!!!!!!!
HAVE YOU HEARD THAT ONE BEFORE?

I have, so am gonna crack on with step 9 regardless of how am
feeling, its a program of action.
Follow sponsors suggestions. Thats all!!

FIRST THINGS FIRST
I have to do this step
Step9 is "in line with" Gods will,
so I MUST exert every ounce of my will to do it
NOT blog.... If you catch me blogging,
ask me if am half way through my amends yet
Or just ignore my posts!!!!

Be ruthless, you have my permission
I want what you have
I did say I would go to any length
I still do & will

Let go Let God
God Bless
Johno

Grateful for "Live and Let Live" in the workplace

So we think cheerfulness and laughter make for usefulness.
P132

Yesterday at work we had such a laugh
we also got so much work done

How often now does at least one person every few day who sits
on our bank of desks say "this dont feel like work" or
"when do we have to do the real work?" we have a very profitable
group of people on here, yet we have lots of time to laugh

childlike, not childish
laugh at ourselves
laugh with each other
All with defects, no-one is perfect
each of us experiences, excited, hysterical,
stroppy, happy, sad, confused, focussed, flirty, restless, calm,
irritable, irritating, discontented, contented, playful, high, low,
hot, cold, hungry, full up..... I could GO ON.
And its all ok
No-one gets hurt.
We are just spiritually sick
We also try to do the right thing at the same time
Different Defects playing up on different days
Different defects playing up in different people
Lots of love, acceptance, forgiveness, honesty, integrity,
openness, sharing experience, patience, tolerence, service around

Live and Let Live
Am learning the meaning of this
It works, it really does
A loving God watches over us

Just for Today "I won't find fault with anything, nor try to
improve or regulate anybody but myself"

Yesterday one of us was sad, lots of tears
We all felt it
We just felt it
Sometimes there is strength in doing nothing, not trying to
regulate anyone continuing to be ourselves and
do whats in front of us - our jobs
Let their sadness come, accept it was part of "their" processing
Let it come and let it go.
This too shall pass, it did, today no sadness, laughter returns

A few years ago was threatened with disciplinery for poor
performance, I was not profitable to the business, & could
show no evidence that I would change. i couldnt do my job &
was paralysed with fear most of my working day trying to
get away with doing very little, because I couldnt manage to
do anything & too afraid to do give up or ask for help.

Tears and laughter all around me in the same day
Useful and profitable, not just in financial terms
Work that feels like play
Free Gym at work with classes...
At last I restarted yoga this lunch time
Lovin the downwards facing dog & cobra

Home group tonight aswell
Theres more but I need to go and read step 9 again
"until i get a handle on it"

I am so freekin blessed
Recovery Rocks!!! Bring it On Dudes!!

Thank you God!!

P132 Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous

I vowed I would NEVER go down the gym again

I have booked a "chat" with a personal trainer!!

Vanity & pride, maybe thats driving it
Nothing! is firm anymore!!

I have a wedding to attend, with lots of
stick like people, no date set yet

Or is this interest in the Gym just another
predictable result of the steps...? Who cares
I'll run!? with it... see what happens

Anyway, this dropped in my inbox today, it had me
in stitches today especially the triceps bit!!!
Hope you Enjoy it tooooooooooooooooooooooo


A WEEK AT THE GYM: ONE MAN'S STORY...

If you read this without laughing out loud, there is something wrong with you. This is dedicated to everyone who ever attempted to get into a regular workout routine.

Dear Diary:

For my 24th birthday this year, my friend Werner purchased a week of personal training at the Virgin health club for me. Although I am still in great shape since playing for my varsity rugby team 18yrs ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try.

I called the club and made my reservation with a personal trainer named Belinda, who identified herself as a 26 yr. old aerobics instructor and model for athletic clothing and swimwear.

Werner seemed pleased with my enthusiasm to get started! The club encouraged me to keep a diary to chart my progress.

MONDAY:

Started my day at 6:00am. Tough to get out of bed, but it was well worth it when I arrived at the health club to find Belinda waiting for me. She was something of a Greek goddess with blonde hair, dancing eyes and a dazzling white smile.

Woo Hoo!!!!!

She took my pulse after 5 minutes on the treadmill. She was alarmed that my pulse was so fast, but I attributed it to standing next to her in her Lycra aerobics outfit. I enjoyed watching the skilful way in which she conducted her aerobics class after my workout today.

Very inspiring, Belinda was encouraging as I did my sit-ups, although my gut was already aching from holding it in the whole time she was around. This is going to be a FANTASTIC week!!

TUESDAY:

I drank a whole pot of coffee, but I finally made it out the door. Belinda made me lie on my back and push a heavy iron bar into the air, and then she put weights on it! My legs were a little wobbly on the treadmill, but I made the full mile. Belinda's rewarding smile made it all worthwhile. I feel GREAT!! It's a whole new life for me.

WEDNESDAY:

The only way I can brush my teeth is by lying on the toothbrush on the counter and moving my mouth back and forth over it. I believe I have a hernia in both pectorals. Driving was OK as long as I didn't try to steer or stop. I parked on top of a moped in the club parking lot. Belinda was impatient with me, insisting that my screams bothered the other club members. Her voice is a little too perky for early in the morning and when she scolds, she gets this nasally whine that is VERY annoying.

My chest hurt when I got on the treadmill, so Belinda put me on the stair monster. Why the hell would anyone invent a machine to simulate an activity rendered obsolete by elevators? Belinda told me it would help me get in shape and enjoy life. She said some other shit too.
THURSDAY:

Belinda was waiting for me with her vampire-like teeth exposed as her thin, cruel lips were pulled back in a full snarl. I couldn't help being a half an hour late; it took me that long to tie my shoes.

Belinda took me to work out with dumbbells. When she was not looking, I ran and hid in the men's room. She sent Lars to find me, then, as punishment, put me on the rowing machine-which sank.

FRIDAY:

I hate that bitch Belinda more than any human being has ever hated any other human being in the history of the world. Stupid, skinny, anaemic little cheerleading bitch. If there were a part of my body I could move without unbearable pain, I would beat her with it. Belinda wanted me to work on my triceps. I don't have any triceps! And if she didn't want dents in the floor, she shouldn't have handed me the*&%#(#&** barbells or anything that weighs more than a sandwich.

The treadmill flung me off and I landed on a health and nutrition teacher. Why couldn't it have been someone softer, like the drama coach or the choir director?

SATURDAY:

Belinda left a message on my answering machine in her grating, shrilly voice wondering why I did not show up today. Just hearing her made me want to smash the machine with my planner. However, I lacked the strength to even use the TV remote and ended up catching eleven straight hours of the Weather Channel.

SUNDAY:

I'm having the Church van pick me up for services today so I can go and thank GOD that this week is over. I will also pray that next year, Werner (the idiot) will choose a gift for me that is fun -like a root canal or a vasectomy!!

I have now "completed" step 8

My heart is smiling
This journey has been & continues to be so interesting
God Obviously loves me
This year or so, have ridden some pretty big waves
I have prayed lots
Timidly
Loudly
Quietly
Patiently
Desperately
Selfishly
Honestly
Lovingly
Happily
Through tears
Cynically
faithfully
willingly
angrily
openmindedly
on knees
stood up
eyes closed
eyes open
out loud
at home
in the park
at work
on the bus
silently
through gritted teeth
with a smile
God hears everything I say & ask for
I always get what I need, which ultimately
is what I always wanted
He gives and takes away
All of which have strengthened my faith
There is a Loving God in my life
And I love having it

Am grateful

I have some Step 9 reading to do
:-)

# Rule 62 Don't take yourself too damn seriously

Step 8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed,
and became willing to make amends to them all.
P59 AA Big Book Alcoholic Anonymous

Gone through Step 8 list.
Its harder staying away from people.
The ones I am to go to dont seem so hard!!

There are no coincidences!! on the way home, found this
"The Little Book of Stress" Rohan Candappa, it had me
giggling away to myself in the shop as i flicked through pages.

Heres a few exerts that hit home after todays step8 sponsor
chat .... none of these have been suggested as the program of
recovery by my sponsor or anyone else for that matter!!

Lost Love
Make a list of all the people who've ever dumped you.
Contact them all once a year and try and restart the relationship.

Get lost Love
Make a list of all the people you've ever dumped.
Contact them once a year and try to restart the relationship

Nurturing is Good
Nurture your greivances. If you dont they'll die and then whoever's
done you wrong will have got away with it.

Its Better That They Should Know
Recognise other peoples limitations. Then tell people what they are.

Borrowed Disinterest
Never return things you borrow

What Friends Are For
Always borrow money from friends. Forget or put off repaying it for as long as possible.

Captain Hook, I Presume?
Never let yourself, or anyone else, off the hook.

The Theory of Relativity
If Einsten was correct and everything is relative, then it's all your parents' fault.
Blame them as often as you can.

If At First Your Dont Succeed...
It must be someone else's fault. Find them; blame them; make them pay.

It Does You Credit
Apply for as many credit cards as you can. Max them out.
Then get more credit cards and do the same.

All above taken from
The Little Book of Stress. "Calm is for Wimps, Get real, Get Stressed"
Rohan Candappa

# Rule 62 Don't take yourself too damn seriously
P149 AA Twelve Steps & 12 Traditions

Its The Weekend

Just got in from Home group
and pizza after the meeting
Inspired by the step9 sharing

YeY am well happy and its only Friday!!
Another two days yet
I have a full weekend
But not too full

Time to be me
Time to see whats going on
Time to experience each thing
Time to experience the inbetween

With people and without

Alone and not

Ordinary & Exciting
Interesting & not loafing

Simple and full at the same time

Grateful for the gifts of today

I have a simple plan

Am Tired, Goodnight

Have a good weekend all!!

The Butcher-The Baker-The Candlestick Maker

Or perhaps it should be The Dentist,
The Plumber and the Carpet Fitter

one of the questions on the form
when did you last visit the dentist ?
my answer.....over 10 years ago

As I now believe there are no coincidences
Its not just because I am now solvent
and have money to spend on stuff
It started during step 7
A sense of knowing and taking action in what
to spend money on ie not fixing

At this stage of our progress we are under
heavy pressure and coercion to do the right thing.
We are obliged to choose between the pains of trying
and the certain penalties of failing to do so. P74

We vigorously commenced this way of living as we cleaned
up the past. We have entered the world of the Spirit. Our
next function is to grow in understanding and effectiveness.
P84

I can continue to listen to by thinking (see below)
driven by my defects
Or take inventory, pray for defects to be removed
Have some faith and ask for help
in the right people Experts in their field

the carpet fitter and a plumber
both in my flat
and i've been to the dentist twice
all in the space of a few weeks

Did the research
Made decsions to do the right things,
let people in, to help me do things
the right things, cos i want to
not just because I need to

Before that I had lots of excuses
too skint in debt
to afraid to have anyone home
no idea what i wanted
to miserly to spend
to worried about what people think of me
already decided i would be ripped off
no reason to see these people
i would manage the way I was
wait til i really needed them
(in my opinion)
anyway my teeth are not as important
.... as carpets and decorating are they!?

Strangely
I made the decsion to see the dentist
no immediate pain or worries
just knew it was the right thing to do
(after a 10year gap) no pun intended!!
to spend money on my teeth
to maintain them seemed as important
as decorating, carpetting AND
maintaining my flat (plumbing)

Plumbing, also not essential
I could have managed longer
(in my opinion)

Again it seems that these things I have NOW
need to be maintained to a level
Flat, body, mind, spirit all need looking after
or they fall to pieces
The aging process will take effect anyway

But I will no longer use the excuses
that I have no time, I am too sick
I cant afford it, I cant take time off work,
I'll call them tomorrow, theiyll rip me off
it'll cost a fortune
not Gods will

And we have ceased fighting anything or
anyone-even alcohol. For by this time sanity
will have returned. P84

ALL that I have been given is a gift
I have choices today what I do
Or is it that I dont have a choice
... its just do the right thing
Its like resistance is difficult
Have stopped fighting anything and everyone
But havent bcome a victim

Dentist..... had a real scale and polish
more like excavate.... lots of stuff to pick out!!!
It took one check up 15 minutes and
less than half an hour treatment
1 filling, or coating no sure what its called
am sitting here with a fat lip, cheek and chin
no food or drink til and no longer numb!!!
yeah am dead lucky
thats all for 6 months
She gave me a plan
brush twice not once a day, or not atall
get a smaller toothbrush
.... cos my mouths very small (its true)
Teeth look a millions dollars
See what do I know!!!

Plumber
One days work inc sourcing the materials
Job done
Fear now gone
Suprised!

Carpet fitter
Great fun, flat now looks amazing
Did a room at a time as I decorated
over a period of a few weeks
helped me move furniture
job done, i just had to ask!!!

Decorating
Done by yours truly
Day, hours at a time, 3 rooms
Abit like step 4 needed doing thoroughly
But its so worth it!!!
So am I

.......40 minutes to go then I can eat

You said it gets better if i kept coming back
this IS all so amazing
Even in its ordinaryness

I coud not have done any of this before
God done for me what I couldnt do for myself
All I have to do was
Honesty, willingness and openminded
and keep turning up NO MATTER WHAT!!!

Oh yeh and i stopped at a wood furniture shop
on the way to dentist, to find out about having
some furniture made....

Someone once said that money WAS good for the soul
Now I do believe it

P74 AA 12 steps & 12 traditions
P84 Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous

Step 10 & 3 Legacies

It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action
and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do,
for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism.
What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the
maintenance of our spiritual condition.

Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of
God’s will into all of our activities.
“How can I best serve Thee-Thy will (not mine) be done.”
These are thoughts which must go with us constantly.
We can exercise our will power along this line all we wish.
It is the proper use of the will.

Much has already been said about receiving strength,
inspiration, and direction from Him who has all knowledge
and power. If we have carefully followed directions,
we have begun to sense the flow of His Spirit into us.
To some extent we have become God-conscious.
We have begun to develop this vital sixth sense.
But we must go further and that means more action.

P85 Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous

Our triangle has 3 sides
3 legacies
Unity
Service
Recovery

When am not practicing all 3 i get a little unbalanced
Dishonest even
Have to say, much fellowship and service going on
have rested up on inventory for a few days
the quality time, which i find so rewarding
has diminished..... self will...
blogging has taken over that time
motives not entirely honest
what happened to first things first
Reliance on God

I like the way I feel when I am doing all 3
so I do it to feel good
strengthen & maintain this
broadband contact with God/Good/Best
a sense of real humour
a sense of real truth
all that positive stuff that comes wth it

To Thine own self be true
Awareness & honesty
yeh back to basics again
HALT
regular inventory
prayer
helping newcomers

Progress not perfection
Practice, practice

Just a bit of action to take
It will all be ok

back soon

Shrove Tuesday

Today I am grateful.....

3 1/2 yrs sober
Happy Birthday Mum
AA gave me some quality time
I have some good memories
contact with brother
to have a laugh with him
to be a real part of his life
to be closer to him than EVER before

for a useful days work
am more easily open to change
for restraint of tongue and pen
for kindness and love
peoples suprising thoughtfulness
bloggers
praying works

did service tonight
I have a Loving God in my life today
I have a conscious contact with it

God wants the Best for me
....the results of these steps are evidence enough
There are NO coincidences

I put my finances in Gods hands Monday
......Let go, gave freely
I received before the day was out
There are NO coincidences this HAS
happened before...
when my MOTIVES were unconditional

grateful for tough love
that the truth ALWAYS sets me free
Gods time not mine
I am enough
I am always work in progress
for willingness
knowing what makes me comfortable
doing what makes me comfortable

having a design for living that works
for this instruction book for a bright life
..... our Big Book
for a further guidance manual
.... our twelve steps and twelve traditions
that I can do a step 10 on my NOT getting
around to having a pancake today!! :-)

God Grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change
Courage to change the things I can
and the wisdom to know the difference

Hope you had a fab shrove tuesday too
I'll make pancakes at the weekend... lots!!!
(If I remember)

Johnooooooooooooooooooo

Step 12

Practical experience shows that nothing
will so much insure immunity from drinking
as intensive work with other alcoholics.
It works when other activities fail.
This is our twelfth suggestion:
Carry this message to other alcoholics!
You can help when no one else can.
You can secure their confidence when other fail.
Remember they are very ill. P89

I had no idea of the depth & gravity
of this statement when I was
CONTINUALLY reminded from
very early on
to go to a meeting and help a newcomer
...when i felt miserable!!

It works
no longer miserable
continuing to follow the suggestion
taking it out into the work place
social stuff
Knowing when to
restrain tongue & not to give advice
and when to share experience
takes practice!!
Praying for people helps

Someone said the 12th step is like
when we stop looking for mirrors and
start looking out of the windows
(i think i may be opening the curtains)

P89 Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous

I am so excited

Last year it seemed like "everyone" around here
was raving on about the Greeek Convention
and the year before
the year before that I wasnt listening!!

This year its working its way in me
if you know what I mean
Seed was planted a few years ago
its starting to flower

Putting in the footwork
Finding out
Speaking to "ok" people thats been
people who tell me their truth

God am i excited
Never been to Athens either

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY
can you feel it ?

At the same time tho
Letting go of the outcome

Then GET THIS....
I asked him.... is it near Rome? :-O
see my global knowledge currently
is a little off beam

:-D

As usual theres more

So thursday night I happily put my pen down
I thought I had finished my list

As per usual step 8 meeting last night
loads of top sharing on the step
me yeh finished my list

it came to me half way through the meeting
I havent listed my sexual harms DOH!!!!!

so theres more, no big deal
It takes as long as it takes

Thoroughly? honestly? yes yes
Any length ? yes

Also
physical, mental, spiritual
The heavyness in my heart is lifting
"Cough & Head cold lifting
Admitted & accepted am human being
around this tim last year i was nursing my sick mum
its her birthday on monday
this time last year she was dying

Head cold.... yeh all linked
this aint no bug, virus
this is all linked to the grieving process
the more I let go and just stop fighting the process
the easier the physical symptoms seem to be

the healing process will happen
I cant make it as painful and prolonged as I like
Thank God my step10's show me EXACTLY
where I am playing God
Exactly where I am trying to control
myself, my feelings, my tears, my thoughts and why
Fear and Pride, Fear and pride, Fear and Pride
Impatience & lots of self will

Will read step3 again tonight
I ask myself, who is in charge ?

In Step 8 I have felt a sense that I am
I am putting aside the wrongs others have done me
and writing a list of all people I have harmed
So it seems the Spiritual principle of Step 8 is
.....Forgiveness of others REGARDLESS