Being convinced, we were at Step Three, which is that we decided to turn our will and our life over to God as we understood Him. Just what do we mean by that, and just what do we do?
The first requirement is that we be convinced that any life run on self-will can hardly be a success. On that basis we are almost always in collision with something or somebody, even though our motives are good. Most people try to live by self-propulsion. Each person is like an actor who wants to run the whole show; is forever trying to arrange the lights, the ballet, the scenery and the rest of the players in his own way. If his arrangements would only stay put, if only people would do as he wished, the show would be great. Everybody, including himself, would be pleased. Life would be wonderful. In trying to make these arrangements our actor may sometimes be quite virtuous. He may be kind, considerate, patient, generous; even modest and self-sacrificing. On the other hand, he may be mean, egotistical, selfish and dishonest. But, as with most humans, he is more likely to have varied traits.
What usually happens? The show doesn´t come off very well. He begins to think life doesn´t treat him right. He decides to exert himself more. He becomes, on the next occasion, still more demanding or gracious, as the case may be. Still the play does not suit him. Admitting he may be somewhat at fault, he is sure that other people are more to blame. He becomes angry, indignant, self-pitying. What is his basic trouble? Is he not really a self-seeker even when trying to be kind? Is he not a victim of the delusion that he can wrest satisfaction and happiness out of this world if he only manages well? Is it not evident to all the rest of the players that these are the things he wants? And do not his actions make each of them wish to retaliate, snatching all they can get out of the show? Is he not, even in his best moments, a producer of confusion rather than harmony?
Our actor is self-centered-ego-centric, as people like to call it nowadays. He is like the retired business man who lolls in the Florida sunshine in the winter complaining of the sad state of the nation; the minister who sighs over the sins of the twentieth century; politicians and reformers who are sure all would be Utopia
if the rest of the world would only behave; the outlaw safe cracker who thinks society has wronged him; and the alcoholic who has lost all and is locked up. Whatever our protestations, are not most of us concerned with ourselves, our resentments, or our self-pity?
Selfishness-self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles. Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate. Sometimes they hurt us, seemingly without provocation, but we invariably find that at some time in the past we have made decisions based on self which later placed us in a position to be hurt.
So our troubles, we think, are basically of our own making. They arise out of ourselves, and the alcoholic is an extreme example of self-will run riot, though he usually doesn´t think so. Above everything, we alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness. We must, or it kills us! God makes that possible. And there often seems no way of entirely getting rid of self without His aid. Many of us had moral and philosophical convictions galore, but we could not live up to them even though we would have liked to. Neither could we reduce our self-centeredness much by wishing or trying on our own power. We had to have God´s help.
This is the how and the why of it. First of all, we had to quit playing God. It didn´t work. Next, we decided that hereafter in this drama of life, God was going to be our Director. He is the Principal; we are His agents. He is the Father, and we are His children. Most Good ideas are simple, and this concept was the keystone of the new and triumphant arch through which we passed to freedom.
When we sincerely took such a position, all sorts of remarkable things followed. We had a new Employer. Being all powerful, He provided what we needed, if we kept close to Him and performed His work well. Established on such a footing we became less and less interested in ourselves, our little plans and designs. More and more we became interested in seeing what we could contribute to life. As we felt new power flow in, as we enjoyed peace of mind, as we discovered we could face life successfully, as we became conscious of His presence, we began to lose our fear of today, tomorrow or the hereafter. We were reborn.
We were now at Step Three. Many of us said to our Maker, as we understood Him: "God, I offer myself to Thee-to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life. May I do Thy will always!" We thought well before taking this step making sure we were ready; that we could at last abandon ourselves utterly to Him.
P60-P63 Alcoholics Anonymous
Sunday, November 11, 2007
Saturday, November 10, 2007
Gratitude..... I have to find some everyday - today with the help of tradition four
Seriously I can be very serious
#Rule 62 Dont take yourself too damn seriously
Have a read of - Tradition 4
from the 12 steps and 12 traditions
I am grateful for....
turning up for lectures
doing the homework
getting excellent marks on another asignment
being on a degree
turning up for work
working when I get there
Being useful
turning up for intergroup
being useful
turning up to homegroup
being useful
turning up at the gym
noticing the difference
turning up for yoga
noticing the difference
turning up at region meeting
being willing
getting honest
admitting to myself and another human being the exact nature of my wrongs
listening to her take on it
grateful for her take on it
grateful to see when am being to hard on myself
finding out I was Thinking too much as usual
for being busy
exerting myself go to a meeting
exerting myself share
exerting myself to do some washing up
exerting myself to eat
exerting myself to hoover up
exerting myself to clean the bathroom
exerting myself to get over my pride and call my sponsor
exerting myself to pray
exerting myself to blog
exerting myself to reply to my cousins email
exerting myself to attempt some homework
accepting that its not gonna happen today
accepting everything is exactly how its meant to be
picking up guitar... and learning to play Wonderwall
you saved me
your my wonderwall
grateful for being sober
turning towards AA and meeetings
finally getting over my pride
finally getting over sefl wil
finally stopping listening to my head that tells me I havent got time
grateful for a lovely meeting!
grateful for a warm clean flat
and a warm clean body
for being willing to go to anylengths
even when it means accepting its not gonna happen
grateful you gave me the concept of
ANYLENGTHS its imperative for this alky
thank you
#Rule 62 Dont take yourself too damn seriously
Have a read of - Tradition 4
from the 12 steps and 12 traditions
I am grateful for....
turning up for lectures
doing the homework
getting excellent marks on another asignment
being on a degree
turning up for work
working when I get there
Being useful
turning up for intergroup
being useful
turning up to homegroup
being useful
turning up at the gym
noticing the difference
turning up for yoga
noticing the difference
turning up at region meeting
being willing
getting honest
admitting to myself and another human being the exact nature of my wrongs
listening to her take on it
grateful for her take on it
grateful to see when am being to hard on myself
finding out I was Thinking too much as usual
for being busy
exerting myself go to a meeting
exerting myself share
exerting myself to do some washing up
exerting myself to eat
exerting myself to hoover up
exerting myself to clean the bathroom
exerting myself to get over my pride and call my sponsor
exerting myself to pray
exerting myself to blog
exerting myself to reply to my cousins email
exerting myself to attempt some homework
accepting that its not gonna happen today
accepting everything is exactly how its meant to be
picking up guitar... and learning to play Wonderwall
you saved me
your my wonderwall
grateful for being sober
turning towards AA and meeetings
finally getting over my pride
finally getting over sefl wil
finally stopping listening to my head that tells me I havent got time
grateful for a lovely meeting!
grateful for a warm clean flat
and a warm clean body
for being willing to go to anylengths
even when it means accepting its not gonna happen
grateful you gave me the concept of
ANYLENGTHS its imperative for this alky
thank you
Sunday, November 04, 2007
How it is today ?
I am ready to find a 2nd home group
I need a 2nd one
I have been putting one particular one out of my mind
a) because I need to study
b) because my sponsor goes
c) because someone I like is free on that day
I have to be willing to let go absolutely in everything
a) I am unable to study on this evening (too tired)
b) its a good meeting, carries the message and offers
fellowship, its not suprising my sponsor goes there.
does that mean I cant too? perhaps I need to find a meeting
and try and carry the message there?
no why do I have to reinvent the wheel? I do not have to crusade
Our real purpose is to fit ourselves to be of maximum service to God and the people about us.P77
this could be turning up to an already good meeting
and carrying my expreience strength and hope
in unity, same message, different messenger
I am there for the same reason she is
to carry the message to the alcoholic who still stuffers
c) Let it Go, its funny how I can put a halt on everything JUSTINCASE
someone I like is free on this day... First things First,
my spiritual fitness must come first
When the spiritual malady is overcome, we straighten out mentally and physicallyp64
I dont feel in the middle of the AA bed
When am not in the middle of the AA bed
I feel disconnected
Got one foot hanging out
unmanageable
the simplest things become mountains
I went to AA region meeting today in GSR role
I felt part of
I found out about more service at Intergroup and region level
and its interesting to me
and its what longer time sober people who have what I want seem to do
(get off there ass's and get involved, take an active interest
in this thing thats saved their lives)
Sponsees are one thing I must do
I also need to maintain my own peace of mind
by doing what feels comfortable to me aswell
Sponsoring is essential to my recovery
nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive work with other alcoholics.P90
I dont enjoy it, infact at the moment
i find it painful watching self will running riot in others
knowing there isnt a damn thing I can do about it
i too am self willed and want to fix it or make it go away
Just for today
I will do at least two things I don't want to - just for exercise.
Sponsoring is one of them (at the moment)
standing by passing it on and letting go
Intergroup and Region is optional
and I find things in there that interest me
and I can volunteer for if i want to
no-one will tell me mmm well you wont stay sober
if you dont do region work! or your not working your programme
if you dont do region level...
So for me its important that I am fitting with our 3 legacies
Am in a changing period in the SERVICE part of our triangle
For my own RECOVERY I need another home group to commit to
For the UNITY I can choose how to carry the message
as long as I carry it with you in line with AA guidelines
It is up to me if I choose to get involved in the links outside of group level
to help carry the message of recovery to the still suffering
who hasnt made it in AA yet
BUT and its a big BUT! I give freely
(thats without resentment or arrogance or self pity)
or dont do it atall!
Oh well thats just how it is today
In a period of change
Change is essential
Change is happening all the time
I either embrace it or fight it
either way I cant stop it!
okay, thats enough of seeing whats going on inside my head today
Nothing am worried about
just using my blog today to process some things
get honest and see what it looks like in the
warm light off the page
Catch you later I need to eat and head off down the gym!
I need a 2nd one
I have been putting one particular one out of my mind
a) because I need to study
b) because my sponsor goes
c) because someone I like is free on that day
I have to be willing to let go absolutely in everything
a) I am unable to study on this evening (too tired)
b) its a good meeting, carries the message and offers
fellowship, its not suprising my sponsor goes there.
does that mean I cant too? perhaps I need to find a meeting
and try and carry the message there?
no why do I have to reinvent the wheel? I do not have to crusade
Our real purpose is to fit ourselves to be of maximum service to God and the people about us.P77
this could be turning up to an already good meeting
and carrying my expreience strength and hope
in unity, same message, different messenger
I am there for the same reason she is
to carry the message to the alcoholic who still stuffers
c) Let it Go, its funny how I can put a halt on everything JUSTINCASE
someone I like is free on this day... First things First,
my spiritual fitness must come first
When the spiritual malady is overcome, we straighten out mentally and physicallyp64
I dont feel in the middle of the AA bed
When am not in the middle of the AA bed
I feel disconnected
Got one foot hanging out
unmanageable
the simplest things become mountains
I went to AA region meeting today in GSR role
I felt part of
I found out about more service at Intergroup and region level
and its interesting to me
and its what longer time sober people who have what I want seem to do
(get off there ass's and get involved, take an active interest
in this thing thats saved their lives)
Sponsees are one thing I must do
I also need to maintain my own peace of mind
by doing what feels comfortable to me aswell
Sponsoring is essential to my recovery
nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive work with other alcoholics.P90
I dont enjoy it, infact at the moment
i find it painful watching self will running riot in others
knowing there isnt a damn thing I can do about it
i too am self willed and want to fix it or make it go away
Just for today
I will do at least two things I don't want to - just for exercise.
Sponsoring is one of them (at the moment)
standing by passing it on and letting go
Intergroup and Region is optional
and I find things in there that interest me
and I can volunteer for if i want to
no-one will tell me mmm well you wont stay sober
if you dont do region work! or your not working your programme
if you dont do region level...
So for me its important that I am fitting with our 3 legacies
Am in a changing period in the SERVICE part of our triangle
For my own RECOVERY I need another home group to commit to
For the UNITY I can choose how to carry the message
as long as I carry it with you in line with AA guidelines
It is up to me if I choose to get involved in the links outside of group level
to help carry the message of recovery to the still suffering
who hasnt made it in AA yet
BUT and its a big BUT! I give freely
(thats without resentment or arrogance or self pity)
or dont do it atall!
Oh well thats just how it is today
In a period of change
Change is essential
Change is happening all the time
I either embrace it or fight it
either way I cant stop it!
okay, thats enough of seeing whats going on inside my head today
Nothing am worried about
just using my blog today to process some things
get honest and see what it looks like in the
warm light off the page
Catch you later I need to eat and head off down the gym!
Thursday, November 01, 2007
Came to believe... Step 2
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. P59
Step 2 doesnt mention the word God. and it says "could" not definitely will, so i wasnt asking for any promises at step 2 and I wasnt being given any either. ALSO I wasnt making any deals to do all the rest of the steps, that was too much for me to take on. No-one asked me to do the rest of the program, I was just suggested to do step 2 while I was on step 2. keep it simple. I was just doing step 2 and not thinking about the rest of the steps (step9 scared the hell out of me when i thought about it back then)
That helped me. I trusted what I saw in the rooms, evidence, and trusted the Loving God it talks about in Tradition 2. The one which helps our amazing loving fellowship hang together, Good Orderly Direction and bring about all this "Good stuff", complete transformations, lifting people out of their misery" it must be something extraordinarily Powerful? and on the right side of Love..
The people who did the steps and continued to maintain and improve and carry the message had been where I have been (and worse) and had what I wanted.
I looked around the fellowship and listened to what it was like and where they are now and heard people much farther down the scale (in all their difficulties and problems) get well and be happy and useful, and people less sick (in my opinion) than me (in all their difficulties and problems) and they got well, happy and whole...
There were people who had craved and physically stuffed by alcohol much more than I, and they got well
There were people far more mental than me (in my opinion) and they got well
There were people who appeared to have been as spiritually as dead as I was, and they got well.
It came to me one night, who are you to say it might not work for you too?
That was when I came to believe a Power greater than myself could or "justmaybe" restore me to sanity... give me what its given them... if i did these things (the rest of the steps) too
Humility... teachable... willing...openminded
All I needed was an open mind and willingness, to be openminded about how powerful these steps actually, and if I was honest, I couldnt deny what I saw and heard in AA.
It is safe to trust the evidence in the room, AA has an amazingly loving spirit running through it, all who thoroughly follow the path get this thing, its a given
I love this thing :)
Tradition Two
For our group purpose there is but one ultimate authority-a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern.
thanks Molly for inspiring my post
Step 2 doesnt mention the word God. and it says "could" not definitely will, so i wasnt asking for any promises at step 2 and I wasnt being given any either. ALSO I wasnt making any deals to do all the rest of the steps, that was too much for me to take on. No-one asked me to do the rest of the program, I was just suggested to do step 2 while I was on step 2. keep it simple. I was just doing step 2 and not thinking about the rest of the steps (step9 scared the hell out of me when i thought about it back then)
That helped me. I trusted what I saw in the rooms, evidence, and trusted the Loving God it talks about in Tradition 2. The one which helps our amazing loving fellowship hang together, Good Orderly Direction and bring about all this "Good stuff", complete transformations, lifting people out of their misery" it must be something extraordinarily Powerful? and on the right side of Love..
The people who did the steps and continued to maintain and improve and carry the message had been where I have been (and worse) and had what I wanted.
I looked around the fellowship and listened to what it was like and where they are now and heard people much farther down the scale (in all their difficulties and problems) get well and be happy and useful, and people less sick (in my opinion) than me (in all their difficulties and problems) and they got well, happy and whole...
There were people who had craved and physically stuffed by alcohol much more than I, and they got well
There were people far more mental than me (in my opinion) and they got well
There were people who appeared to have been as spiritually as dead as I was, and they got well.
It came to me one night, who are you to say it might not work for you too?
That was when I came to believe a Power greater than myself could or "justmaybe" restore me to sanity... give me what its given them... if i did these things (the rest of the steps) too
Humility... teachable... willing...openminded
All I needed was an open mind and willingness, to be openminded about how powerful these steps actually, and if I was honest, I couldnt deny what I saw and heard in AA.
It is safe to trust the evidence in the room, AA has an amazingly loving spirit running through it, all who thoroughly follow the path get this thing, its a given
I love this thing :)
Tradition Two
For our group purpose there is but one ultimate authority-a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern.
thanks Molly for inspiring my post
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Being Convinced..... Step 3
The first requirement is that we be convinced that any life run on self-will can hardly be a success. On that basis we are almost always in collision with something or somebody, even though our motives are good. P60
I am well and truly out of
a tunnel I slipped into last week
having a mixture of PMT
and self will run riot
I told my sponsor I wasnt happy
she asked why
and I listed a heap of stuff!!
Phew!!
I needed to get that one out
She said that its hard trying to control the world
I was not a victim and if I took the drama away
I am just facing a few challenges
thats all!
When am in a tunnel
I cant see anything clearly
I can feel everything
I have slipped into a few times along the way
I used to look for the light switch
or the light at the end
Cos I didnt trust the darkness
This time I knew to keep walking
knocking into stuff I cant see
just keep walking
doing the next right thing
knowing at some point
i dont know when
it will become lighter again
and it has
faith is key for me
its grown from experience
I put the study books down last week
didnt go on a social
and went to a few more meetings
my peace of mind IS more important
to me that the course
without stability sobriety
I am nothing
guess what?
all was ok (are you suprised?)
I am not
Hindsight or as I heard this week
delayed wisdom LOL
used to be my teacher
now experience is my tunnel guide
and faith that I will be ok in the dark
as long as i dont sit down and wait for
things to change or give up and stop
They said at the beginning of the course
Turn up for everything
No matter what
Things are getting harder
So its even more important to
keep on keeping on
Got an excellent mark in an assessment
evidence to me that am on the right track
Everything is exactly as it should be
I dont have to make everything better
sometimes everything is
very challenging and difficult
if it were easy, everyone would be doing the course!
I needed to stop trying to try to let go
and just let go
get it?
no, I dont now
but it made sense at the time
and it will again when I get reminded
God, I offer myself to Thee-to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life. May I do Thy will always!" P63
Johno stop listening to your head
it tells you a pack of lies
just keep on keeping on
til your done!
Remember it was agreed at the beginning we would go to any lengths for victory over alcohol. P76 I also agree to put victory over old ideas in this one aswell.
I am well and truly out of
a tunnel I slipped into last week
having a mixture of PMT
and self will run riot
I told my sponsor I wasnt happy
she asked why
and I listed a heap of stuff!!
Phew!!
I needed to get that one out
She said that its hard trying to control the world
I was not a victim and if I took the drama away
I am just facing a few challenges
thats all!
When am in a tunnel
I cant see anything clearly
I can feel everything
I have slipped into a few times along the way
I used to look for the light switch
or the light at the end
Cos I didnt trust the darkness
This time I knew to keep walking
knocking into stuff I cant see
just keep walking
doing the next right thing
knowing at some point
i dont know when
it will become lighter again
and it has
faith is key for me
its grown from experience
I put the study books down last week
didnt go on a social
and went to a few more meetings
my peace of mind IS more important
to me that the course
without stability sobriety
I am nothing
guess what?
all was ok (are you suprised?)
I am not
Hindsight or as I heard this week
delayed wisdom LOL
used to be my teacher
now experience is my tunnel guide
and faith that I will be ok in the dark
as long as i dont sit down and wait for
things to change or give up and stop
They said at the beginning of the course
Turn up for everything
No matter what
Things are getting harder
So its even more important to
keep on keeping on
Got an excellent mark in an assessment
evidence to me that am on the right track
Everything is exactly as it should be
I dont have to make everything better
sometimes everything is
very challenging and difficult
if it were easy, everyone would be doing the course!
I needed to stop trying to try to let go
and just let go
get it?
no, I dont now
but it made sense at the time
and it will again when I get reminded
God, I offer myself to Thee-to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life. May I do Thy will always!" P63
Johno stop listening to your head
it tells you a pack of lies
just keep on keeping on
til your done!
Remember it was agreed at the beginning we would go to any lengths for victory over alcohol. P76 I also agree to put victory over old ideas in this one aswell.
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Monday, October 22, 2007
Say hi to Sid and Dominick!!
New bloggers
say hi to
Sid "a Christian 12 stepper"
and Dominick hammering his way through with a sense of humour!!
Today (I)
We began to see that the world and its people really dominated us. In that state, the wrong-doing of others, fancied or real, had power to actually kill P66
Today I had someone living rent free in my head (resentment)
Today I have been praying through the day
Where did my freedom go?
God has dealt with this stuff in his own way
Tonight God gave me a wonderful phone call with a sponsee
I gave time time
I had faith
Praying works
When I dont know what to do
I know what to do
I continue to pray for Direction
until I know what to do
about what I dont know what to do...
Then I do it
say hi to
Sid "a Christian 12 stepper"
and Dominick hammering his way through with a sense of humour!!
Today (I)
We began to see that the world and its people really dominated us. In that state, the wrong-doing of others, fancied or real, had power to actually kill P66
Today I had someone living rent free in my head (resentment)
Today I have been praying through the day
Where did my freedom go?
God has dealt with this stuff in his own way
Tonight God gave me a wonderful phone call with a sponsee
I gave time time
I had faith
Praying works
When I dont know what to do
I know what to do
I continue to pray for Direction
until I know what to do
about what I dont know what to do...
Then I do it
Sunday, October 21, 2007
My Pain v Your Pain
My pain is more painful
Until I listen to your pain
then I think my pain isnt that bad
You really dont understand how I am feeling
You think I really dont know how you are feeling
Open your mind!
Is the pain you felt after being grabbed/assaulted in the street
LESS painful than I felt in childhood sexual abuse?
Is the pain you feel in giving up smoking and staying stopped
LESS painful than my giving up drinking and staying stopped?
Is the pain I felt after losing a parent
LESS painful than you feel changing a sponsor?
Is the pain I felt in turning up for work everyday
LESS painful than you feel turning up for a home group each week?
Is the pain i feel when you suggest I go out somewhere new
MORE painful than the way you feel when I suggest you pray?
Is the pain you feel when you eat too much chocolate
LESS painful than the pain I feel when I refuse to eat?
Is the pain I feel when you suggest I delete a number off my phone
MORE painful than the pain you feel when I suggest you stay away from that bar?
Is the pain I feel when I get to work late
MORE painful than the pain you feel when you take a line of coke?
Is the pain I feel when I see you smoking when you have cancer
MORE painful that the pain you feel when you hear I wont pray?
Is the pain I feel when I hear your pain when you wont take inventory
MORE painful than the pain you feel when you hear my pain when I wont let go?
NO
Pain is Pain is all painful
Its my arrogance that tells me my pain is more painful than your pain
How do i know?
Its my arrogance that tells me my pain is not as painful as your pain
How do i know?
To try and exert our will try and live along spiritual lines
Forgiving others for their shortfalls
accepting I am just the same
Is painful
Pain is not a weakness
Its simply part of the human condition
Knowing that doesnt relieve the pain
Accepting it doesnt relieve the pain
Pain is the problem
Pain leads to growth
Growth is found in the solution
Pain to peace is possible
Living in the solution
Going to anylengths to releive the pain
Perseverance
Face Everything And Recover
Do you like being in pain?
Do you know any other?
Do you like living in the problem?
Have you tried everything ?
EVERYTHING?
have we given time time?
have we set conditions on when we want the pain relieved?
have we set conditions on what we will do to relieve the pain?
have we set conditions on what we wont do to relieve the pain?
... well nearly anything....
Its ok, Spiritual lines is.... not immoral or illegal
When I am in pain...
there is always something I havent tried
which always relieves me of pain
which doesnt include
anything mood altering
or old isolating destructive behaviour
having said all that
this post is about
pain and pain
we all feel it
Question is
what are we prepared to do about it ?
anything?
If we dont know...
Give time time
We will soon know
Until I listen to your pain
then I think my pain isnt that bad
You really dont understand how I am feeling
You think I really dont know how you are feeling
Open your mind!
Is the pain you felt after being grabbed/assaulted in the street
LESS painful than I felt in childhood sexual abuse?
Is the pain you feel in giving up smoking and staying stopped
LESS painful than my giving up drinking and staying stopped?
Is the pain I felt after losing a parent
LESS painful than you feel changing a sponsor?
Is the pain I felt in turning up for work everyday
LESS painful than you feel turning up for a home group each week?
Is the pain i feel when you suggest I go out somewhere new
MORE painful than the way you feel when I suggest you pray?
Is the pain you feel when you eat too much chocolate
LESS painful than the pain I feel when I refuse to eat?
Is the pain I feel when you suggest I delete a number off my phone
MORE painful than the pain you feel when I suggest you stay away from that bar?
Is the pain I feel when I get to work late
MORE painful than the pain you feel when you take a line of coke?
Is the pain I feel when I see you smoking when you have cancer
MORE painful that the pain you feel when you hear I wont pray?
Is the pain I feel when I hear your pain when you wont take inventory
MORE painful than the pain you feel when you hear my pain when I wont let go?
NO
Pain is Pain is all painful
Its my arrogance that tells me my pain is more painful than your pain
How do i know?
Its my arrogance that tells me my pain is not as painful as your pain
How do i know?
To try and exert our will try and live along spiritual lines
Forgiving others for their shortfalls
accepting I am just the same
Is painful
Pain is not a weakness
Its simply part of the human condition
Knowing that doesnt relieve the pain
Accepting it doesnt relieve the pain
Pain is the problem
Pain leads to growth
Growth is found in the solution
Pain to peace is possible
Living in the solution
Going to anylengths to releive the pain
Perseverance
Face Everything And Recover
Do you like being in pain?
Do you know any other?
Do you like living in the problem?
Have you tried everything ?
EVERYTHING?
have we given time time?
have we set conditions on when we want the pain relieved?
have we set conditions on what we will do to relieve the pain?
have we set conditions on what we wont do to relieve the pain?
... well nearly anything....
Its ok, Spiritual lines is.... not immoral or illegal
When I am in pain...
there is always something I havent tried
which always relieves me of pain
which doesnt include
anything mood altering
or old isolating destructive behaviour
having said all that
this post is about
pain and pain
we all feel it
Question is
what are we prepared to do about it ?
anything?
If we dont know...
Give time time
We will soon know
Saturday, October 20, 2007
And another Paulo
Warrior of Light Blog
and how I see it fits
with the Just for Today card
and Big Book
This is Edition no 157
Fragments of a non-existing diary
In the plane between Melbourne and Los Angeles
This extract from the on-board magazine is attributed to Loren Eisley:
“The journey is difficult, long, sometimes impossible. Even so, I know few people who have let these difficulties stop them. We enter the world without knowing for sure what happened in the past, what consequences this has brought us, and what the future may have in store for us.
“We shall try to travel as far as we can. But looking at the landscape around us, we realize that it won’t be possible to know and learn everything.
”So what remains is for us to remember all about our journey so that we can tell stories. To our children and grandchildren, we can tell the marvels that we have seen and the dangers that we have faced. They too will be born and will die, they too will tell their stories to their descendants, and still the caravan won’t have reached its destination.”
Just for today
I will adjust myself to what is,
and not try to adjust everything to my own desires.
I will take my "luck" as it comes, and fit myself to it.
Notes to self
Enjoy the journey
Pay attention
No need to be afraid
everything is exactly the way its meant to be
Enjoy the present moment
There is no fear in the here and now
God doesnt give me more than I can handle
Have faith
We paddle, God steers
There are no coincidences
Put in the footwork, let go of the outcome
Turn up and see what happens
Face everything and recover
To thine own self be true
Big Book
The spiritual life is not a theory. We have to live it.P83
We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. P83
Established on such a footing we became less and less interested in ourselves, our little plans and designs. More and more we became interested in seeing what we could contribute to life.p63
Is he not a victim of the delusion that he can wrest satisfaction and happiness out of this world if he only manages well?P61
God, I offer myself to Thee-to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt P63
All men of faith have courage. They trust their God.P68
We do not tire so easily, for we are not burning up energy foolishly as we did when we were trying to arrange life to suit ourselves. P88
We missed the reality and the beauty of the forest because we were diverted by the ugliness of some its trees. We never gave the spiritual side of life a fair hearing.P50
Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help p63
Make it plain he is under no obligation to you, that you hope only that he will try to help other alcoholics when he escapes his own difficulties.p94
He had come to pass his experience along to me-if I cared to have it.P9
We feel we are on the Broad Highway, walking hand in hand with the Spirit of the Universe. p75
I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows.p76
and how I see it fits
with the Just for Today card
and Big Book
This is Edition no 157
Fragments of a non-existing diary
In the plane between Melbourne and Los Angeles
This extract from the on-board magazine is attributed to Loren Eisley:
“The journey is difficult, long, sometimes impossible. Even so, I know few people who have let these difficulties stop them. We enter the world without knowing for sure what happened in the past, what consequences this has brought us, and what the future may have in store for us.
“We shall try to travel as far as we can. But looking at the landscape around us, we realize that it won’t be possible to know and learn everything.
”So what remains is for us to remember all about our journey so that we can tell stories. To our children and grandchildren, we can tell the marvels that we have seen and the dangers that we have faced. They too will be born and will die, they too will tell their stories to their descendants, and still the caravan won’t have reached its destination.”
Just for today
I will adjust myself to what is,
and not try to adjust everything to my own desires.
I will take my "luck" as it comes, and fit myself to it.
Notes to self
Enjoy the journey
Pay attention
No need to be afraid
everything is exactly the way its meant to be
Enjoy the present moment
There is no fear in the here and now
God doesnt give me more than I can handle
Have faith
We paddle, God steers
There are no coincidences
Put in the footwork, let go of the outcome
Turn up and see what happens
Face everything and recover
To thine own self be true
Big Book
The spiritual life is not a theory. We have to live it.P83
We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. P83
Established on such a footing we became less and less interested in ourselves, our little plans and designs. More and more we became interested in seeing what we could contribute to life.p63
Is he not a victim of the delusion that he can wrest satisfaction and happiness out of this world if he only manages well?P61
God, I offer myself to Thee-to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt P63
All men of faith have courage. They trust their God.P68
We do not tire so easily, for we are not burning up energy foolishly as we did when we were trying to arrange life to suit ourselves. P88
We missed the reality and the beauty of the forest because we were diverted by the ugliness of some its trees. We never gave the spiritual side of life a fair hearing.P50
Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help p63
Make it plain he is under no obligation to you, that you hope only that he will try to help other alcoholics when he escapes his own difficulties.p94
He had come to pass his experience along to me-if I cared to have it.P9
We feel we are on the Broad Highway, walking hand in hand with the Spirit of the Universe. p75
I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows.p76
Sunday, October 14, 2007
A Taste of Honey, Tasting much Sweeter than Wine....
Been down the gym
then spent most of the day
writing an essay, in silence
tis done YAY
Silence, yeh, i couldnt find anything
to have on in the background
Today Silence was Golden
Tonights different
Theres been a load of programmes on TV
about Bob Dylan and folk music
for some reason, its been perfect background
for me tonight, another assignment done
Its not been an easy week
Abit like self knowledge is not enough...
I have all this new information
and no idea how to set it on paper LOL
Thankfully someone volunteered to show me
a method yesterday which I have followed today
structuring an argument and supporting it
Phew! not perfect I am sure
But for a first attempt, I am pleased
will read it again tomorrow
before handing it in Tuesday
Great weekend really
Homegroup Friday a late one!
Out with friends last night
feeling really ok
it seems ages since I drank alcohol
it seems alien that I drank alcohol
seems normal now to order water etc
got home and made a start on the essay
this is the freedom from bondage
to get home nearly midnight
and willingly make a start
just putting about 800words of
whatever was in there on paper
It made today so much easier
some of it was irrelevant
some was suprisingly ok!
Gym this morning
and then back on it
Course became my higher power earlier this week
or was it my primary purpose for living...
those days were very hard
gladly the hair shirt is off for the time being
and am wearing life a little more like a loose garment
I also became aware of a relatively new non AA person
who has been more in my thoughts and in front of me this week
more than usual i mean, i have known for a while now though
since being sober
The old habits, old ideas, reappeared
thankfully I see them coming, and how destructive they are
I didnt question, I am trying to live my ideals
not be ruled by my defects
so a new healthy relationship is happening
(no assumptions, no fantasy, no predictions, no mind reading)
a relationship which means talking to someone and listening LOL
friendship, intimacy, taking a risk
see how it goes
whatever happens, I will still breathe
A Taste of Honey popped into my head tonight
and it reminded me of a summer
when I was well into self harm
isolating and being an all round
miserable f*cked up teenager
I stayed at a friends grandparents in Heage
a village in Derbyshire for a weekend
All I remember is the sun shining all weekend
they have a really big lawn
and an old victorian house
massive greenhouse not quite as big as those pictured in the link!
and a croquet lawn
we went down to the village fete or something
I enjoyed it and also remember feeling disconnected
not present, numb
the garden, the green and the sunshine, feeling warm
really sticks out
and it was the year I first encounted
the Venus Flytrap!
An I only just as I got to the end of the post realised
whet the 2nd line of the song is!
so I added it in the title
THERE ARE NO COINCIDENCES
Anyway thats enough tonight
One last assignment before bed
I will leave you with
the song that I first heard that weekend
played on an old 45rpm vinyl!
A Taste Of Honey - The Beatles
sadly its abit jumpy am afraid
then spent most of the day
writing an essay, in silence
tis done YAY
Silence, yeh, i couldnt find anything
to have on in the background
Today Silence was Golden
Tonights different
Theres been a load of programmes on TV
about Bob Dylan and folk music
for some reason, its been perfect background
for me tonight, another assignment done
Its not been an easy week
Abit like self knowledge is not enough...
I have all this new information
and no idea how to set it on paper LOL
Thankfully someone volunteered to show me
a method yesterday which I have followed today
structuring an argument and supporting it
Phew! not perfect I am sure
But for a first attempt, I am pleased
will read it again tomorrow
before handing it in Tuesday
Great weekend really
Homegroup Friday a late one!
Out with friends last night
feeling really ok
it seems ages since I drank alcohol
it seems alien that I drank alcohol
seems normal now to order water etc
got home and made a start on the essay
this is the freedom from bondage
to get home nearly midnight
and willingly make a start
just putting about 800words of
whatever was in there on paper
It made today so much easier
some of it was irrelevant
some was suprisingly ok!
Gym this morning
and then back on it
Course became my higher power earlier this week
or was it my primary purpose for living...
those days were very hard
gladly the hair shirt is off for the time being
and am wearing life a little more like a loose garment
I also became aware of a relatively new non AA person
who has been more in my thoughts and in front of me this week
more than usual i mean, i have known for a while now though
since being sober
The old habits, old ideas, reappeared
thankfully I see them coming, and how destructive they are
I didnt question, I am trying to live my ideals
not be ruled by my defects
so a new healthy relationship is happening
(no assumptions, no fantasy, no predictions, no mind reading)
a relationship which means talking to someone and listening LOL
friendship, intimacy, taking a risk
see how it goes
whatever happens, I will still breathe
A Taste of Honey popped into my head tonight
and it reminded me of a summer
when I was well into self harm
isolating and being an all round
miserable f*cked up teenager
I stayed at a friends grandparents in Heage
a village in Derbyshire for a weekend
All I remember is the sun shining all weekend
they have a really big lawn
and an old victorian house
massive greenhouse not quite as big as those pictured in the link!
and a croquet lawn
we went down to the village fete or something
I enjoyed it and also remember feeling disconnected
not present, numb
the garden, the green and the sunshine, feeling warm
really sticks out
and it was the year I first encounted
the Venus Flytrap!
An I only just as I got to the end of the post realised
whet the 2nd line of the song is!
so I added it in the title
THERE ARE NO COINCIDENCES
Anyway thats enough tonight
One last assignment before bed
I will leave you with
the song that I first heard that weekend
played on an old 45rpm vinyl!
A Taste Of Honey - The Beatles
sadly its abit jumpy am afraid
Thursday, October 11, 2007
another Paulo Coehlo
Melbourne, Australia
I step out on to the stage with the usual apprehension. A local writer, introduces me and starts asking me questions. Before I can conclude my reasoning, he interrupts me and asks another question. When I answer, he says something like “that answer wasn’t very clear.” Five minutes later, I feel a certain restlessness in the audience. I remember Confucius, and do the only thing possible:
“Do you like what I write?” I ask.
“That doesn’t matter,” he answers. “I’m doing the interviewing, not you.”
“But it does matter. You don’t let me finish a sentence. Confucius said: ‘whenever possible, be clear.’ Let’s follow that advice and make things quite clear: do you like what I write?”
“No, I don’t. I have read only two books, and I hated them.”
“OK, so now we can continue.”
The camps were now defined. The audience relaxes, the environment fills with electricity, the interview turns into a true debate, and everyone – including the writer – is satisfied with the result.
Just for today
I will be agreeable.
I will look as well as I can, dress becomingly,
keep my voice low, be courteous, criticize not one bit.
I won't find fault with anything,
nor try to improve or regulate anybody but myself.
I step out on to the stage with the usual apprehension. A local writer, introduces me and starts asking me questions. Before I can conclude my reasoning, he interrupts me and asks another question. When I answer, he says something like “that answer wasn’t very clear.” Five minutes later, I feel a certain restlessness in the audience. I remember Confucius, and do the only thing possible:
“Do you like what I write?” I ask.
“That doesn’t matter,” he answers. “I’m doing the interviewing, not you.”
“But it does matter. You don’t let me finish a sentence. Confucius said: ‘whenever possible, be clear.’ Let’s follow that advice and make things quite clear: do you like what I write?”
“No, I don’t. I have read only two books, and I hated them.”
“OK, so now we can continue.”
The camps were now defined. The audience relaxes, the environment fills with electricity, the interview turns into a true debate, and everyone – including the writer – is satisfied with the result.
Just for today
I will be agreeable.
I will look as well as I can, dress becomingly,
keep my voice low, be courteous, criticize not one bit.
I won't find fault with anything,
nor try to improve or regulate anybody but myself.
Paolo & Just for today
Hakone, Japan
I finally manage to get my editor, Masao Masuda, to invite me to a traditional tea ceremony. We go to a mountain near Hakone, enter a small room, and his sister, dressed in the ritual kimono, serves us tea.
That is all. However, everything is done with such seriousness and protocol that a daily practice is changed into a moment of communion with the Universe.
The tea master, Okakusa Kasuko, explains what happens: “The ceremony is the adoration of the beautiful. All efforts are concentrated on the endeavor to attain Perfection through the imperfect gestures of daily life. All its beauty consists of respecting the simple things we do, because they can lead us to God.”
Just for today
I will be unafraid.
Especially I will not be afraid to enjoy
what is beautiful and to believe that as I give to the world,
so the world will give to me.
I finally manage to get my editor, Masao Masuda, to invite me to a traditional tea ceremony. We go to a mountain near Hakone, enter a small room, and his sister, dressed in the ritual kimono, serves us tea.
That is all. However, everything is done with such seriousness and protocol that a daily practice is changed into a moment of communion with the Universe.
The tea master, Okakusa Kasuko, explains what happens: “The ceremony is the adoration of the beautiful. All efforts are concentrated on the endeavor to attain Perfection through the imperfect gestures of daily life. All its beauty consists of respecting the simple things we do, because they can lead us to God.”
Just for today
I will be unafraid.
Especially I will not be afraid to enjoy
what is beautiful and to believe that as I give to the world,
so the world will give to me.
Paolo Coehlo - inspires me, I love so much of this mans writing and what he shares of others
Paolo Coehlo has been a conistently
inspirational writer for me
for a few years now
His simplicity and gentleness
is exactly what I need
his writing gives my heart that glow
I identify and love reading
his Works
God gave us Paulo Coelho
So I thought I would share some more
of his Warrior of Light Blog
and how I see it fits
with the Just for Today card
and the Big Book
If not members of religious bodies, we sometimes select and memorize a few set prayers which emphasize the principles we have been discussing. There are many helpful books also. p87
Again This is Edition no 157
Fragments of a non-existing diary
Copacabana, Rio de Janeiro
Strolling along the promenade, I hear a young woman saying to another in a very convincing voice: “I’ve programmed my life in the following way ...”
That made me wonder: does she take into account things that happen just when we are not expecting them? Has she considered that maybe God has a different plan, a far more interesting one? Has she thought seriously about the hypothesis that, by including other people in her program, she might be interfering in different ideas and projects?
I am not sure whether the sentence I overheard was born of inexperience or total delirium.
Just for today
I will adjust myself to what is,
and not try to adjust everything to my own desires.
I will take my "luck" as it comes, and fit myself to it.
Notes to self
I dont know whats good for me
I dont know whats best for me
Am I sure I know ? no
Am I sure I dont know ? no
My best thinking got me in here
God obviously wants the best for me
Trust God
Have faith
Blind faith
Why do you need to know whats gonna happen?
Why do you neeed to know?
Let it unfold
The joy in not knowing
I dont like suprises
I would like to like suprises
Do I trust you? 100%?
let go, let God
Analysis paralysis
Some of us have tried to hold onto our old ideas...
Rigidness, does not allow the sunlight in
Open up the dirty window
Lighten up
Dance like there is no one watching
Stop predicting
Stop mind reading
Stop crystal ball gazing
Stop thinking and just do it
Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous
Most people try to live by self-propulsion. Each person is like an actor who wants to run the whole show; is forever trying to arrange the lights, the ballet, the scenery and the rest of the players in his own way.p60
First of all, we had to quit playing God. It didn´t work. Next, we decided that hereafter in this drama of life, God was going to be our Director. He is the Principal; we are His agents. He is the Father, and we are His children. Most Good ideas are simple, and this concept was the keystone of the new and triumphant arch through which we passed to freedom.p62
We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer
running the show, humbly saying to ourselves many times each day “Thy will be done.” We are then in much less danger of excitement, fear, anger, worry, self-pity, or foolish decisions. We become much more efficient. We do not tire so easily, for we are not burning up energy foolishly as we did when we were trying to arrange life to suit ourselves.P87
We are sure God wants us to be happy, joyous, and free. P133
inspirational writer for me
for a few years now
His simplicity and gentleness
is exactly what I need
his writing gives my heart that glow
I identify and love reading
his Works
God gave us Paulo Coelho
So I thought I would share some more
of his Warrior of Light Blog
and how I see it fits
with the Just for Today card
and the Big Book
If not members of religious bodies, we sometimes select and memorize a few set prayers which emphasize the principles we have been discussing. There are many helpful books also. p87
Again This is Edition no 157
Fragments of a non-existing diary
Copacabana, Rio de Janeiro
Strolling along the promenade, I hear a young woman saying to another in a very convincing voice: “I’ve programmed my life in the following way ...”
That made me wonder: does she take into account things that happen just when we are not expecting them? Has she considered that maybe God has a different plan, a far more interesting one? Has she thought seriously about the hypothesis that, by including other people in her program, she might be interfering in different ideas and projects?
I am not sure whether the sentence I overheard was born of inexperience or total delirium.
Just for today
I will adjust myself to what is,
and not try to adjust everything to my own desires.
I will take my "luck" as it comes, and fit myself to it.
Notes to self
I dont know whats good for me
I dont know whats best for me
Am I sure I know ? no
Am I sure I dont know ? no
My best thinking got me in here
God obviously wants the best for me
Trust God
Have faith
Blind faith
Why do you need to know whats gonna happen?
Why do you neeed to know?
Let it unfold
The joy in not knowing
I dont like suprises
I would like to like suprises
Do I trust you? 100%?
let go, let God
Analysis paralysis
Some of us have tried to hold onto our old ideas...
Rigidness, does not allow the sunlight in
Open up the dirty window
Lighten up
Dance like there is no one watching
Stop predicting
Stop mind reading
Stop crystal ball gazing
Stop thinking and just do it
Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous
Most people try to live by self-propulsion. Each person is like an actor who wants to run the whole show; is forever trying to arrange the lights, the ballet, the scenery and the rest of the players in his own way.p60
First of all, we had to quit playing God. It didn´t work. Next, we decided that hereafter in this drama of life, God was going to be our Director. He is the Principal; we are His agents. He is the Father, and we are His children. Most Good ideas are simple, and this concept was the keystone of the new and triumphant arch through which we passed to freedom.p62
We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer
running the show, humbly saying to ourselves many times each day “Thy will be done.” We are then in much less danger of excitement, fear, anger, worry, self-pity, or foolish decisions. We become much more efficient. We do not tire so easily, for we are not burning up energy foolishly as we did when we were trying to arrange life to suit ourselves.P87
We are sure God wants us to be happy, joyous, and free. P133
Saturday, October 06, 2007
Tradition 11 - Attraction NOT promotion - safeguarding the future of AA for the still suffering alcoholic who hasnt made it YET
Tradition 11 - Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio, and films
Its easy to get bogged down with
oh well I can ignore this tradition
its about
press, radio, film
so it doesnt apply to me?
Wrong!
So whats it mean to the likes of me or you
who "today" is unlikely to
be pressed, radiod or filmed?
I speak for myself here
I look at what does apply, not what doesnt
what I can apply and not what I cant
and strive to maintain it
Public relations... thats anyone not in AA
whom I come into contact with
Attraction not promotion
this is practicing these principles in ALL my affairs
It is helpful to the still suffering
or the out their wilding it about unaware
When I apply the principles of this
programme at work
my colleague knows I led a "wild" drinking life
(wild is not a word i would use :D)
and likens it to hers...currently !?
she knows I have stopped
She knows the consequences became to disturbing
she identifies when I discuss my past
she knows her drinking is a problem
she hasnt yet reached a point
where she has had enough
So my job is to be of maximum helpfulness
and do my job, rock solid
even when she cant, and doesnt
I do
it helps her, that i am there
no matter what
I have no idea what the future holds
But I do know that
by leading by example it helps her
By living the spiritual way of life
I help her
A cousin is well in drinking himself to insanity
I have been watching
speaking with him (on and off) about AA
and them about Al-Anon
(for friends and families of alcoholics)
not rescuing, helping and letting go
helping and letting go over the last 4 years
often repeating myself
which is so often what you guys did for me..
until we are ready to hear
My uncle called me up recently and asked what he could do
This man is a proud man, retired armed forces...
big pint drinker... though not a drunk (i dont think!)
to call anyone up and admit he is beaten
and at a loss what to do with his son
IS a credit to AA and attraction not promotion
its not me, I am just the message carrier
By NOT standing in judgement or
the great know it all Alcoholic expert
just by being me
by being a responsible daughter
practicing patience, tolerence and love
with my Dad, it helped my dad, talk with his brother
We have a responsiblility when we get well
to carry the message (Step 12) and safeguard this thing
for the future alcoholic who wants it (Trad 5)
When? How long for?
The answer my friends is now and forever
Both of which reside in the present moment
Heres an extract from Paulo Coelho's Blog
I read today which
inspired the post along with my
Home group last night which was
on Tradition 11
Thinking about future generations
When he was a young man, Abin-Alsar overheard a conversation his father had with a dervish.
‘Be careful how you act,’ said the dervish. ‘Think about how your actions might affect future generations.’
‘What have I got do with future generations?’ said his father. ‘I won’t ever meet them. When I die, that will be that, and I don’t care what my descendants say about me.’
Abin-Alsar never forgot this conversation. All his life, he tried to do good, to help people and to carry out his work with enthusiasm.
He became known as a man who cared about others. When he died, he left behind him a large number of charitable projects which considerably improved the standard of living in his city.
He had ordered the following epitaph to be engraved on his tomb:
‘A life that ends with death is a life not worth living.’
.................................................................
Is your life affected by someone's drinking?
To help them, you have to help yourself first
call Al-Anon/Alateen
.................................................................
.... This week, I have had a massive hit of
"new vocabulary" OUCH!
... and acceptance
I will be wearing a dictionary in my left hand
for the forseeable future :)
Its easy to get bogged down with
oh well I can ignore this tradition
its about
press, radio, film
so it doesnt apply to me?
Wrong!
So whats it mean to the likes of me or you
who "today" is unlikely to
be pressed, radiod or filmed?
I speak for myself here
I look at what does apply, not what doesnt
what I can apply and not what I cant
and strive to maintain it
Public relations... thats anyone not in AA
whom I come into contact with
Attraction not promotion
this is practicing these principles in ALL my affairs
It is helpful to the still suffering
or the out their wilding it about unaware
When I apply the principles of this
programme at work
my colleague knows I led a "wild" drinking life
(wild is not a word i would use :D)
and likens it to hers...currently !?
she knows I have stopped
She knows the consequences became to disturbing
she identifies when I discuss my past
she knows her drinking is a problem
she hasnt yet reached a point
where she has had enough
So my job is to be of maximum helpfulness
and do my job, rock solid
even when she cant, and doesnt
I do
it helps her, that i am there
no matter what
I have no idea what the future holds
But I do know that
by leading by example it helps her
By living the spiritual way of life
I help her
A cousin is well in drinking himself to insanity
I have been watching
speaking with him (on and off) about AA
and them about Al-Anon
(for friends and families of alcoholics)
not rescuing, helping and letting go
helping and letting go over the last 4 years
often repeating myself
which is so often what you guys did for me..
until we are ready to hear
My uncle called me up recently and asked what he could do
This man is a proud man, retired armed forces...
big pint drinker... though not a drunk (i dont think!)
to call anyone up and admit he is beaten
and at a loss what to do with his son
IS a credit to AA and attraction not promotion
its not me, I am just the message carrier
By NOT standing in judgement or
the great know it all Alcoholic expert
just by being me
by being a responsible daughter
practicing patience, tolerence and love
with my Dad, it helped my dad, talk with his brother
We have a responsiblility when we get well
to carry the message (Step 12) and safeguard this thing
for the future alcoholic who wants it (Trad 5)
When? How long for?
The answer my friends is now and forever
Both of which reside in the present moment
Heres an extract from Paulo Coelho's Blog
I read today which
inspired the post along with my
Home group last night which was
on Tradition 11
Thinking about future generations
When he was a young man, Abin-Alsar overheard a conversation his father had with a dervish.
‘Be careful how you act,’ said the dervish. ‘Think about how your actions might affect future generations.’
‘What have I got do with future generations?’ said his father. ‘I won’t ever meet them. When I die, that will be that, and I don’t care what my descendants say about me.’
Abin-Alsar never forgot this conversation. All his life, he tried to do good, to help people and to carry out his work with enthusiasm.
He became known as a man who cared about others. When he died, he left behind him a large number of charitable projects which considerably improved the standard of living in his city.
He had ordered the following epitaph to be engraved on his tomb:
‘A life that ends with death is a life not worth living.’
.................................................................
Is your life affected by someone's drinking?
To help them, you have to help yourself first
call Al-Anon/Alateen
.................................................................
.... This week, I have had a massive hit of
"new vocabulary" OUCH!
... and acceptance
I will be wearing a dictionary in my left hand
for the forseeable future :)
Wednesday, October 03, 2007
Settling in on course & plumbing fixed
The course, well I think
Its ALLLLLL new
Well not its not all new
just knowledge presented in a different context
some new stuff though aswell
Oh yeh
as usual when embarking and embracing
change starting on a new Step, new job,
or letting go of an old behaviour,
sponsor, idea, partner
The Nightmare came SUNDAY
I had been watching out for it
and well gave up on it
and it came with a vengence
Nightmare Sunday night
EEEEEEEK it was a shocker
I have no idea
how my mind comes up with them
God please tone it down next time
Monday, after lecture
I slept SOOO soundly or did my brain just flake off?
I slept through alarm clocks
Infact sponsee woke me up with her early morning call!!
Yesterdays was easier, and I left lighter
So I am very happy
Lots to do this week
but manageable and attemptable
Its easy to see how complicated I could make it...
If I didnt listen and be guided by the lecturer
Day to day
Back in on Yoga
Back down the gym tonight
Turning up for work and working
(as opposed to think about course)
Plumbing... yes plumbing thats a story
Blocked pipes for a while
Plumber recommended some drain uinblocker
Plumbers merchant refused to sell it me
Cos "if I wasnt careful I would stain my furniture"!?
I still get resentment when I go into a plumbers merchant
and they talk to me like I dont know what a copper pipe is
or where my stop cock is and what a ball cock does
Dont they know who I am!? the arrogance of me yeh get down Johno
(I am a DIY enthusiast)
I didnt argue, just left after a few attempts to buy it
I just had to accept they didnt want to sell it me for my own good
Gods Angels and Kindness, comes in many forms
I went to B&Q saturday
and bought the same drain unblocker
off the shelf with no human aid
the instructions and warnings are on the box
clearly written
Resentment and defects aside
B&Q is MUST, its got everything I could want and need!
Its a 4th dimension
Its one of the few shops I can leave
WITHOUT getting a resentment
I love B&Q! its true!
Anyway, used it EXACTLY how it was said
nothing happened
put more in
nothing
and again
nothing
next morning again
nothing... still blocked
self will run riot
not willing to spend out on a plumber
determind to fix it on self will
and prayer
finally, gave up and let go
tried the plumber who was MIA all week...
his phone had been locked in on a job!
It is worth waiting for I promise...
So my AA plumber is sick
so i offer to take my key over to him
so he can come over sometime to fix it
yes, so i make a 5 hour round trip to take key
for my benefit, we have AA chat at same time
great company I have to say
I get home
Put the washer on just incase its fixed
even though am telling myself that
INSANITY is repeating the same thing over and over
and expecting a different result
Anyway, what happened was, the blockage had shifted
I ran a bath, it drained in RECORD time
what had occured ?
a bleeddin miracle!?
I was prepared to finally let go and hand it over
to a PLUMBER greater than myself
God knows how much that was gonna cost
and it fixed itself...
Itself and the drain unblocker.. and prayer of course!
I am grateful this is a win win win situation
why?
I got peace of mind, my plumbing is fixed
I dont get a very large plumbers bill
which means I got more money to spend on
very expensive uni books!
win win win
Have a good week all :)
I am happy and grateful
I am not immune,
I have fear around my course
inventory shows me the truth
A day at a time
follow the instructions
ask questions
keep it simple
be guided by the lecturer/s (power greater than)
just turn up to everything
attempt everything
do my best
right or wrong
nothing... NOTHING goes to waste!
Thank you God
Its ALLLLLL new
Well not its not all new
just knowledge presented in a different context
some new stuff though aswell
Oh yeh
as usual when embarking and embracing
change starting on a new Step, new job,
or letting go of an old behaviour,
sponsor, idea, partner
The Nightmare came SUNDAY
I had been watching out for it
and well gave up on it
and it came with a vengence
Nightmare Sunday night
EEEEEEEK it was a shocker
I have no idea
how my mind comes up with them
God please tone it down next time
Monday, after lecture
I slept SOOO soundly or did my brain just flake off?
I slept through alarm clocks
Infact sponsee woke me up with her early morning call!!
Yesterdays was easier, and I left lighter
So I am very happy
Lots to do this week
but manageable and attemptable
Its easy to see how complicated I could make it...
If I didnt listen and be guided by the lecturer
Day to day
Back in on Yoga
Back down the gym tonight
Turning up for work and working
(as opposed to think about course)
Plumbing... yes plumbing thats a story
Blocked pipes for a while
Plumber recommended some drain uinblocker
Plumbers merchant refused to sell it me
Cos "if I wasnt careful I would stain my furniture"!?
I still get resentment when I go into a plumbers merchant
and they talk to me like I dont know what a copper pipe is
or where my stop cock is and what a ball cock does
Dont they know who I am!? the arrogance of me yeh get down Johno
(I am a DIY enthusiast)
I didnt argue, just left after a few attempts to buy it
I just had to accept they didnt want to sell it me for my own good
Gods Angels and Kindness, comes in many forms
I went to B&Q saturday
and bought the same drain unblocker
off the shelf with no human aid
the instructions and warnings are on the box
clearly written
Resentment and defects aside
B&Q is MUST, its got everything I could want and need!
Its a 4th dimension
Its one of the few shops I can leave
WITHOUT getting a resentment
I love B&Q! its true!
Anyway, used it EXACTLY how it was said
nothing happened
put more in
nothing
and again
nothing
next morning again
nothing... still blocked
self will run riot
not willing to spend out on a plumber
determind to fix it on self will
and prayer
finally, gave up and let go
tried the plumber who was MIA all week...
his phone had been locked in on a job!
It is worth waiting for I promise...
So my AA plumber is sick
so i offer to take my key over to him
so he can come over sometime to fix it
yes, so i make a 5 hour round trip to take key
for my benefit, we have AA chat at same time
great company I have to say
I get home
Put the washer on just incase its fixed
even though am telling myself that
INSANITY is repeating the same thing over and over
and expecting a different result
Anyway, what happened was, the blockage had shifted
I ran a bath, it drained in RECORD time
what had occured ?
a bleeddin miracle!?
I was prepared to finally let go and hand it over
to a PLUMBER greater than myself
God knows how much that was gonna cost
and it fixed itself...
Itself and the drain unblocker.. and prayer of course!
I am grateful this is a win win win situation
why?
I got peace of mind, my plumbing is fixed
I dont get a very large plumbers bill
which means I got more money to spend on
very expensive uni books!
win win win
Have a good week all :)
I am happy and grateful
I am not immune,
I have fear around my course
inventory shows me the truth
A day at a time
follow the instructions
ask questions
keep it simple
be guided by the lecturer/s (power greater than)
just turn up to everything
attempt everything
do my best
right or wrong
nothing... NOTHING goes to waste!
Thank you God
Saturday, September 29, 2007
Ever seen a baby panda sneeze?
Its the big panda's look of "What the 'uck???"
that cracks me up EVERYTIME!
Happy weekend all :)
that cracks me up EVERYTIME!
Happy weekend all :)
Thursday, September 27, 2007
I am VERY excited, and I have even started yet!!
Oh my God
This week has been a journey in itself
Got so much done
Its ALL fitted into place
Time management?
Nah its AA time
theres extra seconds in Gods AA time
Everything I need to do up to today
Is done
How cool is that?
Yesterday I went in search if the Library
Losing myself in the warrens inspite
of asking direction 3 times
A journey within the journey
Yeh I found it, awesome
Today I found my way round the building easy
(I'd walked the whole building last night)
Today I get excited about software
Thats available to make studying easier
Today whilst other people were asking
Whats the least amount of classes you have to attend?
But you cant rely on the tube?
When do the resits take place?
I find myself asking
What do I have to do to get a
First Class Honours Degree
Aim for perfection
Settle for excellence
he smiled and said we'll show you
one of the modules this semester
In each of the meetings I have
been to this week
they stress the importance
of turning up to everything
doing the preparation
your tutor will lead you in
reading material, research sources
everything
Tonight he said
We assume when you start the course
You know nothing about the subject
We suggest you turn up
keep turning up
follow instructions
at the end of the course
You will be autonomous and wont need us anymore
'uck me
Its not rocket science is it?
Today This feels right
This IS my time
Just for today I am unafraid
Here's a VERY well used piece of writing
from Nelson Mandela's Inaugural speech 1994
Its something I have on my wall at home
To the writer...Thank you
4 years ago
I would have loved this piece of writing
But I wouldnt have felt it
Not really, not in my heart
I would have wanted it
But it would have been out of reach
Today I can say I fully agree
Today I believe this absolutely
Today I am living this
whats made the difference?
having a desire stop drinking
Admitting and accepting I am an alcoholic
Admitting and Accepting without reservation I will never be able to drink safely
Accepting I suffer from a mental illness
Accepting I need spiritual help
Accepting I need to change
Stopping thinking and just doing it anyway
Being willing to do WHATEVER IT TAKES
DOING the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous
being willing to face, let go
and keep letting go of ALL my flawsp64
Trusting God absolutely
Good Sponsorship
Willingness to be of service
in and out of AA
Practicing Honesty
Openmindedness
Willingness
Humility
In all my affairs
AND KEEPING ON KEEPING ON
Tuesday, said goodbye to my home group
Let go with love, I have a lecture tuesdays
Today finally Mums Will was distributed
Money on its way across the world
Tomorrow, in search of a plumbers merchant
I have blocked pipes!!
yeh its amazing how much IS possible
these days
All this in one week
done more, but i need a bath...
And unlike Ms Gadget-Irish Friend
I haven't spree'd out on the latest Apple stuff!!
YET :)
Both you and the new man must walk day by day in the path of spiritual progress. If you persist, remarkable things will happen. When we look back, we realize that the things which came to us when we put ourselves in God’s hands were better than anything we could have planned. Follow the dictates of a Higher Power and you will presently live in a new and wonderful world, no matter what your present circumstances! p100
Today I have starry eyes
Filled with Love and Gratitude
Thank you
This week has been a journey in itself
Got so much done
Its ALL fitted into place
Time management?
Nah its AA time
theres extra seconds in Gods AA time
Everything I need to do up to today
Is done
How cool is that?
Yesterday I went in search if the Library
Losing myself in the warrens inspite
of asking direction 3 times
A journey within the journey
Yeh I found it, awesome
Today I found my way round the building easy
(I'd walked the whole building last night)
Today I get excited about software
Thats available to make studying easier
Today whilst other people were asking
Whats the least amount of classes you have to attend?
But you cant rely on the tube?
When do the resits take place?
I find myself asking
What do I have to do to get a
First Class Honours Degree
Aim for perfection
Settle for excellence
he smiled and said we'll show you
one of the modules this semester
In each of the meetings I have
been to this week
they stress the importance
of turning up to everything
doing the preparation
your tutor will lead you in
reading material, research sources
everything
Tonight he said
We assume when you start the course
You know nothing about the subject
We suggest you turn up
keep turning up
follow instructions
at the end of the course
You will be autonomous and wont need us anymore
'uck me
Its not rocket science is it?
Today This feels right
This IS my time
Just for today I am unafraid
Here's a VERY well used piece of writing
from Nelson Mandela's Inaugural speech 1994
Its something I have on my wall at home
To the writer...Thank you
4 years ago
I would have loved this piece of writing
But I wouldnt have felt it
Not really, not in my heart
I would have wanted it
But it would have been out of reach
Today I can say I fully agree
Today I believe this absolutely
Today I am living this
whats made the difference?
having a desire stop drinking
Admitting and accepting I am an alcoholic
Admitting and Accepting without reservation I will never be able to drink safely
Accepting I suffer from a mental illness
Accepting I need spiritual help
Accepting I need to change
Stopping thinking and just doing it anyway
Being willing to do WHATEVER IT TAKES
DOING the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous
being willing to face, let go
and keep letting go of ALL my flawsp64
Trusting God absolutely
Good Sponsorship
Willingness to be of service
in and out of AA
Practicing Honesty
Openmindedness
Willingness
Humility
In all my affairs
AND KEEPING ON KEEPING ON
Tuesday, said goodbye to my home group
Let go with love, I have a lecture tuesdays
Today finally Mums Will was distributed
Money on its way across the world
Tomorrow, in search of a plumbers merchant
I have blocked pipes!!
yeh its amazing how much IS possible
these days
All this in one week
done more, but i need a bath...
And unlike Ms Gadget-Irish Friend
I haven't spree'd out on the latest Apple stuff!!
YET :)
Both you and the new man must walk day by day in the path of spiritual progress. If you persist, remarkable things will happen. When we look back, we realize that the things which came to us when we put ourselves in God’s hands were better than anything we could have planned. Follow the dictates of a Higher Power and you will presently live in a new and wonderful world, no matter what your present circumstances! p100
Today I have starry eyes
Filled with Love and Gratitude
Thank you
Are you afraid of failing or suceeding ?
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate
Our deepest fear is
that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness
that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, who am I to be
brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn't serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about
shrinking so that other people
won't feel insecure around you.
We were born to make manifest
the glory of God that is within us.
It is not just in some of us, it's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine.
We unconsciously give other people
permission to do the same
As we are liberated from our own fear, our prescence
automatically liberates others.
Nelson Mandela
Inaugural speech 1994
Our deepest fear is
that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness
that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, who am I to be
brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn't serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about
shrinking so that other people
won't feel insecure around you.
We were born to make manifest
the glory of God that is within us.
It is not just in some of us, it's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine.
We unconsciously give other people
permission to do the same
As we are liberated from our own fear, our prescence
automatically liberates others.
Nelson Mandela
Inaugural speech 1994
Monday, September 24, 2007
You are now entering the 4th Dimension - My chains fell off, my heart was free
I had the most bizarre conversation today
Hi its .... from ...
Well we have had the whole department
searching for your exam
and we have decided,we have lost you entrance exam
We aren't sure how, as only 3 of you sat it
and we have 2 of them here, its just yours
Pause (johno listened blinking)
and its undesirable for us to have you to sit the test again
pause (johno keep quiet)
so how do you think you did?
I dont know, thats what i was hoping you were going to tell me
well how do you think you did?
I found it hard
how hard, do you do this in your daily work life?
no I dont write essays, I have written reports
not like this though, I cannot compare the two
I haven't written an essay in nearly 20 years
I found it difficult
and so how do you think you would get on on the course?
I dont know, I know i will need help, as i said to you
on the open day, you do have the help there dont you?
yes we do
and do many people make use of it?
yes some people become dependent on it some people
just need help for certain aspects
well i would be someone that would get help definitely
johno's heart sank a little
would it suprise you if i was encouraged by your
honesty about your skill level? most people would have
said they, had breezed through the exam and would
be trying to impress a place on the course...
especially as we have lost your paper
but you arent
er no, i dont know if i will be able to do it
i dont know how much help i need, i just know I will need
help thats all, but i would like to
try this year to see how it goes
i would just like the opportunity to try
pause
ok, on that basis we will offer you a place
I will write the letter now
thank you
THANK YOU GOD
am blown away by opportunity
I watch what you do with others
I see what you do in others
letting go
Letting you
Giving all of me
Absolute trust
why wouldnt I?
everything i offer you absolutely
becomes Gold
Putting all of me in your hands
Is the BEST thing I have EVER done
You shown me in others what You can do
You take away their difficulties
and this helps me
and then when am willing and ready
you take away my difficulties
that victory over them may bear witness
to those I would help
Of Thy Power, Thy Glory, Thy Way of Life
May I do Thy Will always!
Will these tears of Joy ever stop?
The impossible just became possible!
THERE ARE NO COINCIDENCES
I BELIEVE IN MIRACLES
Click the arrow above artist
Tim Hughes - Holding nothing back
Abridged
My chains fell of, my heart was free
I'm alive to live for you
I'm alive to live for you
Amazing Love, how can it be?
You gave evertything for me
You gave evertything for me
everything
Nothings gonna hold me back
Nothings gonna hold me back
Nothings gonna hold me back
Free to love
Free to give
Free to be
I'm Free to love You....
Hi its .... from ...
Well we have had the whole department
searching for your exam
and we have decided,we have lost you entrance exam
We aren't sure how, as only 3 of you sat it
and we have 2 of them here, its just yours
Pause (johno listened blinking)
and its undesirable for us to have you to sit the test again
pause (johno keep quiet)
so how do you think you did?
I dont know, thats what i was hoping you were going to tell me
well how do you think you did?
I found it hard
how hard, do you do this in your daily work life?
no I dont write essays, I have written reports
not like this though, I cannot compare the two
I haven't written an essay in nearly 20 years
I found it difficult
and so how do you think you would get on on the course?
I dont know, I know i will need help, as i said to you
on the open day, you do have the help there dont you?
yes we do
and do many people make use of it?
yes some people become dependent on it some people
just need help for certain aspects
well i would be someone that would get help definitely
johno's heart sank a little
would it suprise you if i was encouraged by your
honesty about your skill level? most people would have
said they, had breezed through the exam and would
be trying to impress a place on the course...
especially as we have lost your paper
but you arent
er no, i dont know if i will be able to do it
i dont know how much help i need, i just know I will need
help thats all, but i would like to
try this year to see how it goes
i would just like the opportunity to try
pause
ok, on that basis we will offer you a place
I will write the letter now
thank you
THANK YOU GOD
am blown away by opportunity
I watch what you do with others
I see what you do in others
letting go
Letting you
Giving all of me
Absolute trust
why wouldnt I?
everything i offer you absolutely
becomes Gold
Putting all of me in your hands
Is the BEST thing I have EVER done
You shown me in others what You can do
You take away their difficulties
and this helps me
and then when am willing and ready
you take away my difficulties
that victory over them may bear witness
to those I would help
Of Thy Power, Thy Glory, Thy Way of Life
May I do Thy Will always!
Will these tears of Joy ever stop?
The impossible just became possible!
THERE ARE NO COINCIDENCES
I BELIEVE IN MIRACLES
Click the arrow above artist
Tim Hughes - Holding nothing back
Abridged
My chains fell of, my heart was free
I'm alive to live for you
I'm alive to live for you
Amazing Love, how can it be?
You gave evertything for me
You gave evertything for me
everything
Nothings gonna hold me back
Nothings gonna hold me back
Nothings gonna hold me back
Free to love
Free to give
Free to be
I'm Free to love You....
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Aim for perfection - Settle for excellence
In AA in my experience
The impossible has become possible
Not by accident
I have had to put in the work
I have had to be openminded
I have had to trust God (of my understnading)
I have had to do all the steps
I have to continue to practice the principles in all my affairs
Go for Gold
Go to anylengths in all life areas
make a decision to turn all my difficulties over to this
Keep on Keeping on
Know God Know Peace
"Aim for perfection, or strive for perfection and settle for excellence"
is something I heard the other evening when I spent time
with a group of musicians
or
We claim spiritual progress not spiritual perfection P60
It reminded me of how easy it can be to believe that this is our lot
Is this it ?
As humans we have very limited thinking
In AA you showed me how to open my mind
How to fire up my imagination
Infact you probably lit the fire and fanned it
at times when i dint couldnt or wouldnt
heres whats on offer IN MY EXPERIENCE in AA
I agree and its IS excellent and its Free
In AA you can have all of this and more!!
Am sure you will find more, as they ARE revealed to you
If you are a pesimist, cynical and skeptical,
you may be thinking
"oh its too long to read yawn, and its God stuff again
i'll never get that lot"
How about reading it anyway?
There is a principle which is a bar against all information, which is proof against all arguments and which cannot fail to keep a man in everlasting ignorance-that principle is contempt prior to investigation."
- Herbert Spencer P570
We want to leave you with the feeling that no situation is too difficult and no unhappiness too great to be overcome. p105
We are sure God wants us to be happy, joyous, and free.P133
Stick with the winners AA Q&A Sponsorship P9
He had that starry-eyed look. Yes, the old boy was on fire all right.P9
Half measures availed us nothing P59
This dream world has been replaced by a great sense of purpose p130
He provided what we needed, if we kept close to Him and performed His work well. P63
Yet we do go to great extremes to provide each other with these very things, when such action is warranted.p98
We found the Great Reality deep down within us.P55
Every one of them has gained access to, and believe in, a Power greater than himself. This Power has in each case accomplished the miraculous, the humanly impossible.P50
Here are thousands of men and women, worldly indeed. They flatly declare that since they have come to believe in a Power greater than themselves, to take a certain attitude toward that Power, and to do certain simple things.P50
There has been a revolutionary change in their way of living and thinking.P50
In the face of collapse and despair, in the face of the total failure of their human resources, they found that a new power, peace, happiness, and sense of direction flowed into them.p50
This happened soon after they wholeheartedly met a few simple requirements. P50
There you will find release from care, boredom and worry. P152
Your imagination will be fired. P152
Life will mean something at last.P152
Life will take on new meaning.P90
To watch people recover to see them help others P90
to watch loneliness vanish P90
to see a fellowship grow up about you P90
to have a host of friends-this is an experience you must not miss. P90
we found ourselves accepting many things which then seemed entirely out of reach p47
We needed to ask ourselves but one short question. "Do I now believe, or am I even willing to believe, that there is a Power greater than myself?" As soon as a man can say that he does believe, or is willing to believe, we emphatically assure him that he is on his way. It has been repeatedly proven among us that upon this simple cornerstone a wonderfully effective spiritual structure can be built. P47
When we sincerely took such a position, all sorts of remarkable things followed P63
When many hundreds of people are able to say that the consciousness of the Presence of God is today the most important fact of their lives, they present a powerful reason why one should have faith.p51
Show any longshoreman a Sunday supplement describing a proposal to explore the moon by means of a rocket and he will say, "I bet they do it-maybe not so long either." p52 (written in the 1930's)
When we saw others solve their problems by a simple reliance upon the Spirit of the Universe, we had to stop doubting the power of God. Our ideas did not work. But the God idea did. p52
The Wright brothers´ almost childish faith that they could build a machine which would fly was the mainspring of their accomplishment. Without that, nothing could have happened.p52
We had seen spiritual release p55
Yet we had been seeing another kind of flight, a spiritual liberation from this world, people who rose above their problems p55
think honestly, encourages you to search diligently within yourself, then, if you wish, you can join us on the Broad Highway. With this attitude you cannot fail.p55
This man recounts that he tumbled out of bed to his knees. In a few seconds he was overwhelmed by a conviction of the Presence of God. It poured over and through him with the certainty and majesty of a great tide at flood. The barriers he had built through the years were swept away. He stood in the Presence of Infinite Power and Love. He had stepped from bridge to shore. For the first time, he lived in conscious companionship with his Creator.
Thus was our friend´s cornerstone fixed in place. No later vicissitude has shaken it. His alcoholic problem was taken away. That very night, years ago, appeared. Save for a few brief moments of temptation the though of drink has never returned; and at such times a great revulsion has risen up in him. Seemingly he could not drink even if he would. God had restored his sanity. p56
What is this but a miracle of healing? p57
Even so has God restored us all to our right minds.p57
But He has come to all who have honestly sought Him.p57
That we have had deep and effective spiritual experiences which have revolutionized our whole attitude toward life, toward our fellows and toward God´s universe.p25
our Creator has entered into our hearts and lives in a way which is indeed miraculous p25
He has commenced to accomplish those things for us which we could never do by ourselves. p25
Father feels he has struck something better than gold.p129
Joy at our release from a lifetime of frustration knew no bounds.p129
Father feels he has struck something better than gold.p129
The spiritual life is not a theory. We have to live it.p83
we will know peace p84
No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others p84
That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear.p84
We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows.
Self-seeking will slip away.p84
Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change.p84
Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us.p84
We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.p84
Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us—sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them.p84
And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone-even alcohol p84
For by this time sanity will have returned. p84
We will seldom be interested in liquor.p84
We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes! That is the miracle of it.p85
We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation.p85
We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality—safe and protected.p85
Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us. We are neither cocky nor are we afraid.p85
That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition.p85
It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition.p85
Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God’s will into all of our activities. “How can I best serve Thee-Thy will (not mine) be done.” These are thoughts which must go with us constantly. We can exercise our will power along this line all we wish. It is the proper use of the will.p85
If we have carefully followed directions, we have begun to sense the flow of His Spirit into us. p85
We have begun to develop this vital sixth sense. But we must go further and that means more action.p85
We are convinced that a spiritual mode of living is a most powerful health restorative.P133
We have found nothing incompatible between a powerful spiritual experience and a life of sane and happy usefulness. P130
Defeat seemed certain. Yet often such men had spectacular and powerful recoveries. P113
Being all powerful, He provided what we needed, if we kept close to Him and performed His work well.p63
A new life has been given us or, if you prefer, a design for living that really works.p28
What seemed at first a flimsy reed, has proved to be the loving and powerful hand of God. p28
We have found much of heaven and we have been rocketed into a fourth dimension of existence of which we had not even dreamed p25
I was soon to be catapulted into what I like to call the fourth dimension of existence. p8
I was to know happiness, peace, and usefulness, in a way of life that is incredibly more wonderful as time passes.p8
I stood in the sunlight at last.p12
These were revolutionary and drastic proposals, but the moment I fully accepted them, the effect was electric p14
There was a sense of victory, followed by such a peace and serenity as I had never know.p14
There was utter confidence. p14
I felt lifted up, as though the great clean wind of a mountain top blew through and through p14
The joy of living we really have, even under pressure and difficulty. p15
There is scarcely any form of trouble and misery which has not been overcome among us. P15
Most of us feel we need look no further for Utopia. We have it with us right here and now. Each day my friend´s simple talk in our kitchen multiplies itself in a widening circle of peace on earth and good will to men. P16
If God can solve the age-old riddle of alcoholism, He can solve your problems too.P116
When we saw others solve their problems by a simple reliance upon the Spirit of the Universe P52
Quite as important was the discovery that spiritual principles would solve all my problems. P42
If you have decided you want what we have and are willing to go to any length to get it-then you are ready to take certain steps.p58
Here are the steps we took, which are suggested as a program of recovery: p59
God will constantly disclose more to you and to us.p163
See to it that your relationship with Him is right, and great events will come to pass for you and countless others. This is the Great Fact for us. p163
Abandon yourself to God as you understand God. Admit your faults to Him and to your fellows. Clear away the wreckage of your past. Give freely of what you find and join us. We shall be with you in the Fellowship of the Spirit, and you will surely meet some of us as you trudge the Road of Happy Destiny. p163
Still you may say: "But I will not have the benefit of contact with you who wrote this book." We cannot be sure. God will determine that, so you must remember that your real reliance is always upon Him. He will show you how to create the fellowship you crave. P163
May God bless you and keep you-until then. P163
I never thought it would be excellent
But it is, it really is
Do not delay dudes
do Steps 1-12
and Keep on Keeping on:)
maintain
Improve
Carry the message
Ps. Course tutor is now on the hunt for my entrance exam
paper.... And Acceptance is the Answer P417
And dont take yourself so damn seriously :D
All page refs AA big Book 4th edition
Except AA Q&A on sponsorship leaflet link
The impossible has become possible
Not by accident
I have had to put in the work
I have had to be openminded
I have had to trust God (of my understnading)
I have had to do all the steps
I have to continue to practice the principles in all my affairs
Go for Gold
Go to anylengths in all life areas
make a decision to turn all my difficulties over to this
Keep on Keeping on
Know God Know Peace
"Aim for perfection, or strive for perfection and settle for excellence"
is something I heard the other evening when I spent time
with a group of musicians
or
We claim spiritual progress not spiritual perfection P60
It reminded me of how easy it can be to believe that this is our lot
Is this it ?
As humans we have very limited thinking
In AA you showed me how to open my mind
How to fire up my imagination
Infact you probably lit the fire and fanned it
at times when i dint couldnt or wouldnt
heres whats on offer IN MY EXPERIENCE in AA
I agree and its IS excellent and its Free
In AA you can have all of this and more!!
Am sure you will find more, as they ARE revealed to you
If you are a pesimist, cynical and skeptical,
you may be thinking
"oh its too long to read yawn, and its God stuff again
i'll never get that lot"
How about reading it anyway?
There is a principle which is a bar against all information, which is proof against all arguments and which cannot fail to keep a man in everlasting ignorance-that principle is contempt prior to investigation."
- Herbert Spencer P570
We want to leave you with the feeling that no situation is too difficult and no unhappiness too great to be overcome. p105
We are sure God wants us to be happy, joyous, and free.P133
Stick with the winners AA Q&A Sponsorship P9
He had that starry-eyed look. Yes, the old boy was on fire all right.P9
Half measures availed us nothing P59
This dream world has been replaced by a great sense of purpose p130
He provided what we needed, if we kept close to Him and performed His work well. P63
Yet we do go to great extremes to provide each other with these very things, when such action is warranted.p98
We found the Great Reality deep down within us.P55
Every one of them has gained access to, and believe in, a Power greater than himself. This Power has in each case accomplished the miraculous, the humanly impossible.P50
Here are thousands of men and women, worldly indeed. They flatly declare that since they have come to believe in a Power greater than themselves, to take a certain attitude toward that Power, and to do certain simple things.P50
There has been a revolutionary change in their way of living and thinking.P50
In the face of collapse and despair, in the face of the total failure of their human resources, they found that a new power, peace, happiness, and sense of direction flowed into them.p50
This happened soon after they wholeheartedly met a few simple requirements. P50
There you will find release from care, boredom and worry. P152
Your imagination will be fired. P152
Life will mean something at last.P152
Life will take on new meaning.P90
To watch people recover to see them help others P90
to watch loneliness vanish P90
to see a fellowship grow up about you P90
to have a host of friends-this is an experience you must not miss. P90
we found ourselves accepting many things which then seemed entirely out of reach p47
We needed to ask ourselves but one short question. "Do I now believe, or am I even willing to believe, that there is a Power greater than myself?" As soon as a man can say that he does believe, or is willing to believe, we emphatically assure him that he is on his way. It has been repeatedly proven among us that upon this simple cornerstone a wonderfully effective spiritual structure can be built. P47
When we sincerely took such a position, all sorts of remarkable things followed P63
When many hundreds of people are able to say that the consciousness of the Presence of God is today the most important fact of their lives, they present a powerful reason why one should have faith.p51
Show any longshoreman a Sunday supplement describing a proposal to explore the moon by means of a rocket and he will say, "I bet they do it-maybe not so long either." p52 (written in the 1930's)
When we saw others solve their problems by a simple reliance upon the Spirit of the Universe, we had to stop doubting the power of God. Our ideas did not work. But the God idea did. p52
The Wright brothers´ almost childish faith that they could build a machine which would fly was the mainspring of their accomplishment. Without that, nothing could have happened.p52
We had seen spiritual release p55
Yet we had been seeing another kind of flight, a spiritual liberation from this world, people who rose above their problems p55
think honestly, encourages you to search diligently within yourself, then, if you wish, you can join us on the Broad Highway. With this attitude you cannot fail.p55
This man recounts that he tumbled out of bed to his knees. In a few seconds he was overwhelmed by a conviction of the Presence of God. It poured over and through him with the certainty and majesty of a great tide at flood. The barriers he had built through the years were swept away. He stood in the Presence of Infinite Power and Love. He had stepped from bridge to shore. For the first time, he lived in conscious companionship with his Creator.
Thus was our friend´s cornerstone fixed in place. No later vicissitude has shaken it. His alcoholic problem was taken away. That very night, years ago, appeared. Save for a few brief moments of temptation the though of drink has never returned; and at such times a great revulsion has risen up in him. Seemingly he could not drink even if he would. God had restored his sanity. p56
What is this but a miracle of healing? p57
Even so has God restored us all to our right minds.p57
But He has come to all who have honestly sought Him.p57
That we have had deep and effective spiritual experiences which have revolutionized our whole attitude toward life, toward our fellows and toward God´s universe.p25
our Creator has entered into our hearts and lives in a way which is indeed miraculous p25
He has commenced to accomplish those things for us which we could never do by ourselves. p25
Father feels he has struck something better than gold.p129
Joy at our release from a lifetime of frustration knew no bounds.p129
Father feels he has struck something better than gold.p129
The spiritual life is not a theory. We have to live it.p83
we will know peace p84
No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others p84
That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear.p84
We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows.
Self-seeking will slip away.p84
Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change.p84
Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us.p84
We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.p84
Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us—sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them.p84
And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone-even alcohol p84
For by this time sanity will have returned. p84
We will seldom be interested in liquor.p84
We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes! That is the miracle of it.p85
We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation.p85
We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality—safe and protected.p85
Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us. We are neither cocky nor are we afraid.p85
That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition.p85
It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition.p85
Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God’s will into all of our activities. “How can I best serve Thee-Thy will (not mine) be done.” These are thoughts which must go with us constantly. We can exercise our will power along this line all we wish. It is the proper use of the will.p85
If we have carefully followed directions, we have begun to sense the flow of His Spirit into us. p85
We have begun to develop this vital sixth sense. But we must go further and that means more action.p85
We are convinced that a spiritual mode of living is a most powerful health restorative.P133
We have found nothing incompatible between a powerful spiritual experience and a life of sane and happy usefulness. P130
Defeat seemed certain. Yet often such men had spectacular and powerful recoveries. P113
Being all powerful, He provided what we needed, if we kept close to Him and performed His work well.p63
A new life has been given us or, if you prefer, a design for living that really works.p28
What seemed at first a flimsy reed, has proved to be the loving and powerful hand of God. p28
We have found much of heaven and we have been rocketed into a fourth dimension of existence of which we had not even dreamed p25
I was soon to be catapulted into what I like to call the fourth dimension of existence. p8
I was to know happiness, peace, and usefulness, in a way of life that is incredibly more wonderful as time passes.p8
I stood in the sunlight at last.p12
These were revolutionary and drastic proposals, but the moment I fully accepted them, the effect was electric p14
There was a sense of victory, followed by such a peace and serenity as I had never know.p14
There was utter confidence. p14
I felt lifted up, as though the great clean wind of a mountain top blew through and through p14
The joy of living we really have, even under pressure and difficulty. p15
There is scarcely any form of trouble and misery which has not been overcome among us. P15
Most of us feel we need look no further for Utopia. We have it with us right here and now. Each day my friend´s simple talk in our kitchen multiplies itself in a widening circle of peace on earth and good will to men. P16
If God can solve the age-old riddle of alcoholism, He can solve your problems too.P116
When we saw others solve their problems by a simple reliance upon the Spirit of the Universe P52
Quite as important was the discovery that spiritual principles would solve all my problems. P42
If you have decided you want what we have and are willing to go to any length to get it-then you are ready to take certain steps.p58
Here are the steps we took, which are suggested as a program of recovery: p59
God will constantly disclose more to you and to us.p163
See to it that your relationship with Him is right, and great events will come to pass for you and countless others. This is the Great Fact for us. p163
Abandon yourself to God as you understand God. Admit your faults to Him and to your fellows. Clear away the wreckage of your past. Give freely of what you find and join us. We shall be with you in the Fellowship of the Spirit, and you will surely meet some of us as you trudge the Road of Happy Destiny. p163
Still you may say: "But I will not have the benefit of contact with you who wrote this book." We cannot be sure. God will determine that, so you must remember that your real reliance is always upon Him. He will show you how to create the fellowship you crave. P163
May God bless you and keep you-until then. P163
I never thought it would be excellent
But it is, it really is
Do not delay dudes
do Steps 1-12
and Keep on Keeping on:)
maintain
Improve
Carry the message
Ps. Course tutor is now on the hunt for my entrance exam
paper.... And Acceptance is the Answer P417
And dont take yourself so damn seriously :D
All page refs AA big Book 4th edition
Except AA Q&A on sponsorship leaflet link
Sunday, September 16, 2007
Faith Without Works is Dead P14,P76, P88
Belief in the power of God, plus enough willingness, honesty and humility to establish and maintain the new order of things, were the essential requirements. P13/14
Simple, but not easy; a price had to be paid. It meant destruction of self-centeredness. I must turn in all things to the Father of Light who presides over us all.P14
My friend had emphasized the absolute necessity of demonstrating these principles in all my affairs. Particularly was it imperative to work with others as he had worked with me. Faith without works was dead, he said. And how appallingly true for the alcoholic! For if an alcoholic failed to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life through work and self-sacrifice for others, he could not survive the certain trials and low spots ahead. If he did not work, he would surely drink again, and if he drank, he would surely die. Then faith would be dead indeed. With us it is just like that.P14/15
In the AA message there are lots of essentials and musts
and requirements, to follow, the result is freedom
Belief in the Power of God PLUS
This means I must believe in a Power Greater than me
This could be what ever it is that keeps AA's sober
It also says the Father of Light, not the grim reaper
It also says who presides over us all, thats all of us,
including you and me and the neighbours
It says absolute necessity, that means its absolutely necessary
that means just do it, no questions
It was imperative to work with others and "she" has worked with me
That means I must work my ass of with newcomers, excersizing
patience, tolerence and pity... and pass on everything I have been given
Faith without works was dead. This means just believing in
the Power of God, Loving God and knowing God is not enough.
I must WORK for him
Do Gods Will, in all my affairs, Gods Work
How appalingly true for the alcoholic... thats cos we
are such selfsih, selfseeking, manipulative people
that if I could just get well and get away with it
and remember it all... i would... mmm
But I cant, i know this, and so I works with the newcomers
Like the comfy starry eyed energy filled attractive people I see
If I didnt do the enlarging and (at times) self sacrifice
for others... I know I wouldnt have survived and lived
through the low spots I have had
I know if I drink again I will die
All the love I have will die
All the wonder I have will die
All the faith I have will die
Dying isnt just a physical death
Although I am sure I would not last very long
Mentally or Physically
I am sure for me too its just like that
So why take the risk
Why analyse all this stuff ?
Its easier softer way to just get on and do it
Trust God
Clean house
Help others
I really want the opportunity to try this course God
I wonder if its in your plan
Just my experience of how I choose
to let it keep me in line
just my interpretation
My choice if I choose to act on the
musts, essentials and absolute necessities
Its my recovery
Take care
:)
Simple, but not easy; a price had to be paid. It meant destruction of self-centeredness. I must turn in all things to the Father of Light who presides over us all.P14
My friend had emphasized the absolute necessity of demonstrating these principles in all my affairs. Particularly was it imperative to work with others as he had worked with me. Faith without works was dead, he said. And how appallingly true for the alcoholic! For if an alcoholic failed to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life through work and self-sacrifice for others, he could not survive the certain trials and low spots ahead. If he did not work, he would surely drink again, and if he drank, he would surely die. Then faith would be dead indeed. With us it is just like that.P14/15
In the AA message there are lots of essentials and musts
and requirements, to follow, the result is freedom
Belief in the Power of God PLUS
This means I must believe in a Power Greater than me
This could be what ever it is that keeps AA's sober
It also says the Father of Light, not the grim reaper
It also says who presides over us all, thats all of us,
including you and me and the neighbours
It says absolute necessity, that means its absolutely necessary
that means just do it, no questions
It was imperative to work with others and "she" has worked with me
That means I must work my ass of with newcomers, excersizing
patience, tolerence and pity... and pass on everything I have been given
Faith without works was dead. This means just believing in
the Power of God, Loving God and knowing God is not enough.
I must WORK for him
Do Gods Will, in all my affairs, Gods Work
How appalingly true for the alcoholic... thats cos we
are such selfsih, selfseeking, manipulative people
that if I could just get well and get away with it
and remember it all... i would... mmm
But I cant, i know this, and so I works with the newcomers
Like the comfy starry eyed energy filled attractive people I see
If I didnt do the enlarging and (at times) self sacrifice
for others... I know I wouldnt have survived and lived
through the low spots I have had
I know if I drink again I will die
All the love I have will die
All the wonder I have will die
All the faith I have will die
Dying isnt just a physical death
Although I am sure I would not last very long
Mentally or Physically
I am sure for me too its just like that
So why take the risk
Why analyse all this stuff ?
Its easier softer way to just get on and do it
Trust God
Clean house
Help others
I really want the opportunity to try this course God
I wonder if its in your plan
Just my experience of how I choose
to let it keep me in line
just my interpretation
My choice if I choose to act on the
musts, essentials and absolute necessities
Its my recovery
Take care
:)
We are not saints - Running on empty
Tried the patience of a saint
Tired of waiting
Tried the patience of an angel
We are not saints P60
Waiting for the results of my exam
Dealing with an incompetent lawyer
Accepting at times the unacceptable
Taking action
Taking inventrory
Praying
Giving freely
Working with newcomers
Passing it on
Turning up for work
restraint of tongue and pen
Doing all the next right things
(well not all, am not perfect)
Handing it over
letting go of the outcome
to the nest of my ability
Keeping on Keeping on
Accpeting powerlessness and taking action
Is all very tiring
I just got empty
I wanted someone to give to me
The difference today is that
I called my sponsor and said
I dont want advice
I dont want fixing
I just need someone to listen to me
and just listen
thats not going to give advice
or go poor me
To speak TO someone thats not wanting from me
is that ok?
She did just that
And then said I was just empty
JUST EMPTY - yeh it was the perfect description
Apparantly even Jesus sometimes took himself off
and had time out..without telling his mates
Well if its good enough for Jesus
Well its good enough for Johno
So I have been spending more time nurturing
my relationship with Him, thats with God as I understand Him
Not Jesus
NOT blogging
Not composing Posts in my head through the day
Not thinking about blogger or facebook
yeh I think about you people, the difference today is
I know your well being is not dependent upon my posts
I know my wellbeing is not dependent on reading your posts
See theres progress for me...
My reliance is on Him, not people
Practicing these principles
Being of service in all my affairs
Relatives, work colleagues... sill suffering
I have along way to go
Step 11 it seems is a journey in itself
I just do what makes me feel good TODAY
I just do what makes me feel good at the moment
And am continually finding out more and more
More is revealed
Nurturing my relationship with the Highest Love
Is the most important thing I need to do each day
and maintaining it
In a desperately needy moment this week
I turned towards, asked his care and protection
I asked God to love me this week
Just to love me, to empty my mind and fill it with Him
to shut my head up so I could hear him
What I got back is very healing, fulfilling
What is this but a miracle of healing? Yet its elements are simple. Circumstances made him willing to believe. He humbly offered himself to his Maker-then he knew. P57
God will constantly disclose more to you and to us. P164
I made a beginning, wrote some songs or are they poems today...
I have never read any Susan Jeffers books
I bought "Embracing Uncertainty" a few years ago
and read the first few pages
The other night I got out of bed and took it off my shelf
It seemed to be that still small voice telling me
God said the other night that should read it
The next day I jokingly said I should go to
Control Freaks Anonymous
And then got a little freaked out when
I read the words "Control Freaks Anonymous"
on the next page the next day...
There are no coincidences
Sometimes I have to put even the simplest things
like what I read in Gods hands
we realize that the things which came to us when we put ourselves in God’s hands were better than anything we could have planned.P100
I read very little except AA literature
During the first 3-4 years of recovery
Mainly because I couldnt concentrate
Or it didnt seem to fit and was hard work
I have built up a small library of books
which jumped out off the shelves...
I know you know what I mean
Nothing goes to waste in recovery it seems
Even so, I am amazed how far I have come
without reading this stuff
yet it all seems like stuff that fits
You guys did all the reading for me
And gave me what I needed when I needed it
my antennae, just picked up the right
Bits at the times it was needed seemed
God did for me what I couldnt do for myself
I've put down Men are from Mars, Women are From Venus
for the time being
I havent handed my will and my life over to the care
of Susan Jeffers as I understand her
But she has already suggested
A way for me to improve my faith
I wonder whats in store for me tomorrow
I wonder whats in Gods Plan for me
The need to improve my relationship with God
is more important for the moment
I have no idea what is store
All in Gods Hands
Even so has God restored us all to our right minds. To this man, the revelation was sudden. Some of us grow into it more slowly. But He has come to all who have honestly sought Him. P57
God is lovely to me
When we drew near to Him He disclosed Himself to us! P57
Tired of waiting
Tried the patience of an angel
We are not saints P60
Waiting for the results of my exam
Dealing with an incompetent lawyer
Accepting at times the unacceptable
Taking action
Taking inventrory
Praying
Giving freely
Working with newcomers
Passing it on
Turning up for work
restraint of tongue and pen
Doing all the next right things
(well not all, am not perfect)
Handing it over
letting go of the outcome
to the nest of my ability
Keeping on Keeping on
Accpeting powerlessness and taking action
Is all very tiring
I just got empty
I wanted someone to give to me
The difference today is that
I called my sponsor and said
I dont want advice
I dont want fixing
I just need someone to listen to me
and just listen
thats not going to give advice
or go poor me
To speak TO someone thats not wanting from me
is that ok?
She did just that
And then said I was just empty
JUST EMPTY - yeh it was the perfect description
Apparantly even Jesus sometimes took himself off
and had time out..without telling his mates
Well if its good enough for Jesus
Well its good enough for Johno
So I have been spending more time nurturing
my relationship with Him, thats with God as I understand Him
Not Jesus
NOT blogging
Not composing Posts in my head through the day
Not thinking about blogger or facebook
yeh I think about you people, the difference today is
I know your well being is not dependent upon my posts
I know my wellbeing is not dependent on reading your posts
See theres progress for me...
My reliance is on Him, not people
Practicing these principles
Being of service in all my affairs
Relatives, work colleagues... sill suffering
I have along way to go
Step 11 it seems is a journey in itself
I just do what makes me feel good TODAY
I just do what makes me feel good at the moment
And am continually finding out more and more
More is revealed
Nurturing my relationship with the Highest Love
Is the most important thing I need to do each day
and maintaining it
In a desperately needy moment this week
I turned towards, asked his care and protection
I asked God to love me this week
Just to love me, to empty my mind and fill it with Him
to shut my head up so I could hear him
What I got back is very healing, fulfilling
What is this but a miracle of healing? Yet its elements are simple. Circumstances made him willing to believe. He humbly offered himself to his Maker-then he knew. P57
God will constantly disclose more to you and to us. P164
I made a beginning, wrote some songs or are they poems today...
I have never read any Susan Jeffers books
I bought "Embracing Uncertainty" a few years ago
and read the first few pages
The other night I got out of bed and took it off my shelf
It seemed to be that still small voice telling me
God said the other night that should read it
The next day I jokingly said I should go to
Control Freaks Anonymous
And then got a little freaked out when
I read the words "Control Freaks Anonymous"
on the next page the next day...
There are no coincidences
Sometimes I have to put even the simplest things
like what I read in Gods hands
we realize that the things which came to us when we put ourselves in God’s hands were better than anything we could have planned.P100
I read very little except AA literature
During the first 3-4 years of recovery
Mainly because I couldnt concentrate
Or it didnt seem to fit and was hard work
I have built up a small library of books
which jumped out off the shelves...
I know you know what I mean
Nothing goes to waste in recovery it seems
Even so, I am amazed how far I have come
without reading this stuff
yet it all seems like stuff that fits
You guys did all the reading for me
And gave me what I needed when I needed it
my antennae, just picked up the right
Bits at the times it was needed seemed
God did for me what I couldnt do for myself
I've put down Men are from Mars, Women are From Venus
for the time being
I havent handed my will and my life over to the care
of Susan Jeffers as I understand her
But she has already suggested
A way for me to improve my faith
I wonder whats in store for me tomorrow
I wonder whats in Gods Plan for me
The need to improve my relationship with God
is more important for the moment
I have no idea what is store
All in Gods Hands
Even so has God restored us all to our right minds. To this man, the revelation was sudden. Some of us grow into it more slowly. But He has come to all who have honestly sought Him. P57
God is lovely to me
When we drew near to Him He disclosed Himself to us! P57
Thursday, September 13, 2007
A Little less Conversation A little more ACTION
a practical program of action.P9
We have a way out on which we can absolutely agree, and upon which we can join in brotherly and harmonious action.P17
Then they outlined the spiritual answer and program of action which a hundred of them had followed successfully.P42
Next we launched out on a course of vigorous action,P63
Chapter 6 INTO ACTION P76
We have then completed Step Seven. Now we need more action, without which we find that “Faith without works is dead.”P76
Before taking drastic action P80.
It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism.P85
when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action.P87
But this is not all. There is action and more action. “Faith without works is dead.” P88
To be vital, faith must be accompanied by self sacrifice and unselfish, constructive action.P93
Outline the program of action P94
After satisfying yourself that your man wants to recover and that he will go to any extreme to do so, you may suggest a definite course of action P142
The two friends spoke of their spiritual experience and told him about the course of action they carried out.P157
In other words, if you think you may be an alcoholic
If you have tried to stop drinking or tried to control your drinking
and found you can't, and you have decided AA probably is for you
even though you dont really want it to be...
fed up of listening to the sound of your own head?
Fed up of listening to the sound of your own voice?
Stop thinking and do the steps
if you are on Step 1 and want step 12
Dont wait til you get well before doing the steps
Dont wait til your life gets better before doing the steps
Dont rely on pink clouds
Self knowledge is not enough
Self will is not enough - and its hard work
Get well by using the steps
Do the steps, all of them in order
The lift to sobriety is broken, please use the steps
Get on with the programme
Get a Sponsor and do the steps
Less analysis, more action
Quit debating
Do not delay
Stop Fighting
Surrender to Win
Take the cotton wool out of your ears and put it in your mouth
Do the steps
Trust the process
Its a Programme of Action, not thinking
Post step 9
Maintain, improve, and pass it on
and practice these principles in ALL you affairs
Step10, 11, 12 in ALL your affairs
Its so damn worth it!!
Act your way into right thinking
Not think your way into right acting
An a Word from God via His Chief choir boy
A little less conversation, a little more action please
All this aggravation aint satisfactioning me
A little more bite and a little less bark
A little less fight and a little more spark
Close your mouth and open up your heart and baby satisfy me
Satisfy me baby
God wants us Happy, joyeous and free...
Gods will not mine be done
Enjoy not endure
its true :)
We have a way out on which we can absolutely agree, and upon which we can join in brotherly and harmonious action.P17
Then they outlined the spiritual answer and program of action which a hundred of them had followed successfully.P42
Next we launched out on a course of vigorous action,P63
Chapter 6 INTO ACTION P76
We have then completed Step Seven. Now we need more action, without which we find that “Faith without works is dead.”P76
Before taking drastic action P80.
It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism.P85
when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action.P87
But this is not all. There is action and more action. “Faith without works is dead.” P88
To be vital, faith must be accompanied by self sacrifice and unselfish, constructive action.P93
Outline the program of action P94
After satisfying yourself that your man wants to recover and that he will go to any extreme to do so, you may suggest a definite course of action P142
The two friends spoke of their spiritual experience and told him about the course of action they carried out.P157
In other words, if you think you may be an alcoholic
If you have tried to stop drinking or tried to control your drinking
and found you can't, and you have decided AA probably is for you
even though you dont really want it to be...
fed up of listening to the sound of your own head?
Fed up of listening to the sound of your own voice?
Stop thinking and do the steps
if you are on Step 1 and want step 12
Dont wait til you get well before doing the steps
Dont wait til your life gets better before doing the steps
Dont rely on pink clouds
Self knowledge is not enough
Self will is not enough - and its hard work
Get well by using the steps
Do the steps, all of them in order
The lift to sobriety is broken, please use the steps
Get on with the programme
Get a Sponsor and do the steps
Less analysis, more action
Quit debating
Do not delay
Stop Fighting
Surrender to Win
Take the cotton wool out of your ears and put it in your mouth
Do the steps
Trust the process
Its a Programme of Action, not thinking
Post step 9
Maintain, improve, and pass it on
and practice these principles in ALL you affairs
Step10, 11, 12 in ALL your affairs
Its so damn worth it!!
Act your way into right thinking
Not think your way into right acting
An a Word from God via His Chief choir boy
A little less conversation, a little more action please
All this aggravation aint satisfactioning me
A little more bite and a little less bark
A little less fight and a little more spark
Close your mouth and open up your heart and baby satisfy me
Satisfy me baby
God wants us Happy, joyeous and free...
Gods will not mine be done
Enjoy not endure
its true :)
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
Some Suggestions that helped some us get sober and help some of us stay sober today
These are suggestions given to newcomers
and inbetweenies
and anyone that wants them really
By my homegroups
They are like the stabilisers
You have attached to your back wheels when you first learn to ride a bike
They are a good beginning, gateway into the 12 steps
They are a structure for the day which most of us need when in early recovery
They are things to do whilst looking for a sponsor
They are things to do if just going to meetings isnt enough
They are things to do when life sucks
They are things to do if the days gone well
They are things to do everyday until you feel better
they are things to do when you dont know what to do
They are things to do when you cant bring to mind what you know you should do
Contempt prior to investigation!
If you are feeling restless, irritable and discontented
Its worth a try until something else comes along
I am daily now referring people to An Irish Friends sidebar
So its time for me to take responsibility and make a post!
As one of our old timers another Irish Friend
as it happens, regularly says
"We cannot think our way into right acting
We have to act out way into right thinking"
Give them a whirl
Trust God
Pray on knees to a Higher Power
- Morning: "please keep me sober today and please look after me today"
- Night: "Thank you for keeping me sober today"
Meditation
- Morning: Read the "Just for Today" card
- Night: Write a list of things to be grateful for (gratitude list) and thank your Higher Power for what you have been given
Sponsor
Phone your sponsor daily and do what suggested. If anything is unclear or if you have problems, this your chance to unburden them. The sponsor is not the higher power, but the programme passed onto us by the sponsor is. we trusted our sponsors first,
Read the AA Big Book
A couple of pages a day (more if you can). This reminds us of what a great life is on offer and reassures us that our sponsors are giving us the real deal.
Service
We aim to do some AA service everyday
- Commit to two weekly meetings - "Home groups" pitch in and be helpful and aim to get two service commitments.
- Phone a couple of newcomers (newer than you) each day. especially helpful on the days when we dont go to a meeting.
Frightened or anxious?
Say the Serenity Prayer
Angry or Annoyed at someone ?
Pray for him/her For example: "Please God bless xx and let him have health, prosperity and happiness" or "Please God, give me tolerence, pity and patience I would cheerfully grant a sick friend" or God, give xx everything I would wish for myself"
And to bring them to life abit more - read this
and inbetweenies
and anyone that wants them really
By my homegroups
They are like the stabilisers
You have attached to your back wheels when you first learn to ride a bike
They are a good beginning, gateway into the 12 steps
They are a structure for the day which most of us need when in early recovery
They are things to do whilst looking for a sponsor
They are things to do if just going to meetings isnt enough
They are things to do when life sucks
They are things to do if the days gone well
They are things to do everyday until you feel better
they are things to do when you dont know what to do
They are things to do when you cant bring to mind what you know you should do
Contempt prior to investigation!
If you are feeling restless, irritable and discontented
Its worth a try until something else comes along
I am daily now referring people to An Irish Friends sidebar
So its time for me to take responsibility and make a post!
As one of our old timers another Irish Friend
as it happens, regularly says
"We cannot think our way into right acting
We have to act out way into right thinking"
Give them a whirl
Trust God
Pray on knees to a Higher Power
- Morning: "please keep me sober today and please look after me today"
- Night: "Thank you for keeping me sober today"
Meditation
- Morning: Read the "Just for Today" card
- Night: Write a list of things to be grateful for (gratitude list) and thank your Higher Power for what you have been given
Sponsor
Phone your sponsor daily and do what suggested. If anything is unclear or if you have problems, this your chance to unburden them. The sponsor is not the higher power, but the programme passed onto us by the sponsor is. we trusted our sponsors first,
Read the AA Big Book
A couple of pages a day (more if you can). This reminds us of what a great life is on offer and reassures us that our sponsors are giving us the real deal.
Service
We aim to do some AA service everyday
- Commit to two weekly meetings - "Home groups" pitch in and be helpful and aim to get two service commitments.
- Phone a couple of newcomers (newer than you) each day. especially helpful on the days when we dont go to a meeting.
Frightened or anxious?
Say the Serenity Prayer
Angry or Annoyed at someone ?
Pray for him/her For example: "Please God bless xx and let him have health, prosperity and happiness" or "Please God, give me tolerence, pity and patience I would cheerfully grant a sick friend" or God, give xx everything I would wish for myself"
And to bring them to life abit more - read this
The Above Suggestions Brought to Life!! By An Irish Friend Of Bill
The Six Things. To do every day.
1. Check in with a sponsor (ideally,) or another long time sober person. Or a very cool ‘Spiritual Friend’.
2. Phone a newcomer. Give it away to keep it. THIS IS YOUR MOST POWERFUL DEFENCE AGAINST DRINKING.
3. Hit your knees. Ask YOUR concept of ‘a power greater than yourself’ (It can be the power of AA as a whole, or the power that makes the earth turn) for a sober day, and say thanks at night. It HAS to be a LOVING concept of a HP. (see Trad 2.) If it is even a little bit judgmental, it’s no good. Ask for help with whatever roadblocks you are experiencing at present,
4. Gratitude list. Work against your natural tendency to take things for granted. Is the glass half empty or half full? Write down 6 things that make you laugh, smile or feel glad to be alive.
5. TRY to do one of the things on the just for today card. Think of it as a portable programme. Carry it with you throughout the day. If you become negative, try applying any one of the instructions on the card to your situation.
6. Read a page of the big book or Go to a meeting. Look out for newcomers and long time sober members. Try to be of service in some form or other while at the meeting. If you want to share, sit at the front, and share first. Start with saying I enjoyed your share and I identified with you.
An Irish Friend Of Bill
1. Check in with a sponsor (ideally,) or another long time sober person. Or a very cool ‘Spiritual Friend’.
2. Phone a newcomer. Give it away to keep it. THIS IS YOUR MOST POWERFUL DEFENCE AGAINST DRINKING.
3. Hit your knees. Ask YOUR concept of ‘a power greater than yourself’ (It can be the power of AA as a whole, or the power that makes the earth turn) for a sober day, and say thanks at night. It HAS to be a LOVING concept of a HP. (see Trad 2.) If it is even a little bit judgmental, it’s no good. Ask for help with whatever roadblocks you are experiencing at present,
4. Gratitude list. Work against your natural tendency to take things for granted. Is the glass half empty or half full? Write down 6 things that make you laugh, smile or feel glad to be alive.
5. TRY to do one of the things on the just for today card. Think of it as a portable programme. Carry it with you throughout the day. If you become negative, try applying any one of the instructions on the card to your situation.
6. Read a page of the big book or Go to a meeting. Look out for newcomers and long time sober members. Try to be of service in some form or other while at the meeting. If you want to share, sit at the front, and share first. Start with saying I enjoyed your share and I identified with you.
An Irish Friend Of Bill
Just for today Card
Just for today
I will try to live through this day only,
and not tackle all my problems at once.
I can do something for twelve hours that would
appall me if I felt I had to keep it up for a lifetime.
Just for today
I will be happy.
This assumes to be true what Abraham Lincoln said,
that "Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be."
Just for today
I will adjust myself to what is,
and not try to adjust everything to my own desires.
I will take my "luck" as it comes, and fit myself to it.
Just for today
I will try to strengthen my mind.
I will study. I will learn something useful.
I will not be a mental loafer. I will read something
that requires effort, thought and concentration.
Just for today
I will exercise my soul in three ways.
I will do somebody a good turn, and not get found out;
if anybody knows of it, it will not count.
I will do at least two things I don't want to - just for exercise.
I will not show anyone that my feelings are hurt;
they may be hurt, but today I will not show it.
Just for today
I will be agreeable.
I will look as well as I can, dress becomingly,
keep my voice low, be courteous, criticize not one bit.
I won't find fault with anything,
nor try to improve or regulate anybody but myself.
Just for today
I will have a program.
I may not follow it exactly, but I will have it.
I will save myself from two pests: hurry and indecision.
Just for today
I will have a quiet half hour all by
myself and relax. During this half hour, sometime,
I will try to get a better perspective of my life.
Just for today
I will be unafraid.
Especially I will not be afraid to enjoy
what is beautiful and to believe that as I give to the world,
so the world will give to me.
I will try to live through this day only,
and not tackle all my problems at once.
I can do something for twelve hours that would
appall me if I felt I had to keep it up for a lifetime.
Just for today
I will be happy.
This assumes to be true what Abraham Lincoln said,
that "Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be."
Just for today
I will adjust myself to what is,
and not try to adjust everything to my own desires.
I will take my "luck" as it comes, and fit myself to it.
Just for today
I will try to strengthen my mind.
I will study. I will learn something useful.
I will not be a mental loafer. I will read something
that requires effort, thought and concentration.
Just for today
I will exercise my soul in three ways.
I will do somebody a good turn, and not get found out;
if anybody knows of it, it will not count.
I will do at least two things I don't want to - just for exercise.
I will not show anyone that my feelings are hurt;
they may be hurt, but today I will not show it.
Just for today
I will be agreeable.
I will look as well as I can, dress becomingly,
keep my voice low, be courteous, criticize not one bit.
I won't find fault with anything,
nor try to improve or regulate anybody but myself.
Just for today
I will have a program.
I may not follow it exactly, but I will have it.
I will save myself from two pests: hurry and indecision.
Just for today
I will have a quiet half hour all by
myself and relax. During this half hour, sometime,
I will try to get a better perspective of my life.
Just for today
I will be unafraid.
Especially I will not be afraid to enjoy
what is beautiful and to believe that as I give to the world,
so the world will give to me.
Serenity Prayer
God grant me
the serenity
to accept the things
I cannot change
Courage to change
the things I can
And wisdom
to know the difference
the serenity
to accept the things
I cannot change
Courage to change
the things I can
And wisdom
to know the difference
New "Kim" on the Blog - Groan -sorry couldnt help myself
Tagged by Kathy ... 8 Random things about me
1. I was a Brownie
2. I have blue eyes
3. I spent time in Nuclear bunkers, "recording" for the "Gov"
4. I sold my worn underwear in a prrn magazine
5. I got swept out to sea in an inflatable dingy
6. I own a complete set of "The Famous Five" books
7. I love Egg Custard
8. I love cats
9. I owned this bike in 2006
10. I get carried away easily once I get over my fear and start talking about myself ;)
Trudge, Determind1, Syd consider yourselves tagged!
2. I have blue eyes
3. I spent time in Nuclear bunkers, "recording" for the "Gov"
4. I sold my worn underwear in a prrn magazine
5. I got swept out to sea in an inflatable dingy
6. I own a complete set of "The Famous Five" books
7. I love Egg Custard
8. I love cats
9. I owned this bike in 2006
10. I get carried away easily once I get over my fear and start talking about myself ;)
Trudge, Determind1, Syd consider yourselves tagged!
Feeling impatient? want recovered in all areas NOW ?
Imagine your defects sitting in front of you
along with your head and the Sh&t fairy
Heres one to try
Try Singing this to your defects of character
Try Singing this as if you are your heart
try singing this from your heart
Sing this to the sh&t fairy that sits on your shoulder
who'se saying its not working or I would be fixed by now
You are recovering from a killer illness (like cancer)
The alcohol problem, appears to have been removed
Which itself is a gift
We then want ACTION in all other areas of our life NOW
It all becomes really clear what needs sorting out, changing
We forget, Alcohol was/is what was killing us physically
even though mentally we may still be
driven insane by our thinking (or should I say
listening to our defective thinking
thinking driven by our defects
which eventually if not dealt with will drive us into
insanity, or death... not just by drinking
The great thing about recovery is
we suddeny see all these other things need changing
improving on, and we want it NOW because we see
others have had it changed, it CAN be done
and we are told we are not the exception
Keep coming back does not quiet the impatience
All in Gods Time, (not mine)
(I keep saying this, I think its gonna be the title
of my first song!?)
Sometimes inventory needs retaking
and retaking
and retaking
on certain life areas
(Step4 & then ongoing Step10's)
Works
Taking responsibility
having faith
Prayer
Allow Willingness, Action and Patience to drive you
The only thing instant in AA is the coffee
And 20-30 years of insanity will not be fixed in 2 or 3 or 4
However it amazing and all areas are being sorted and resorted
improved and improved
The best is yet to come
So while your still healing
Have a little patience
Take That - Patience
along with your head and the Sh&t fairy
Heres one to try
Try Singing this to your defects of character
Try Singing this as if you are your heart
try singing this from your heart
Sing this to the sh&t fairy that sits on your shoulder
who'se saying its not working or I would be fixed by now
You are recovering from a killer illness (like cancer)
The alcohol problem, appears to have been removed
Which itself is a gift
We then want ACTION in all other areas of our life NOW
It all becomes really clear what needs sorting out, changing
We forget, Alcohol was/is what was killing us physically
even though mentally we may still be
driven insane by our thinking (or should I say
listening to our defective thinking
thinking driven by our defects
which eventually if not dealt with will drive us into
insanity, or death... not just by drinking
The great thing about recovery is
we suddeny see all these other things need changing
improving on, and we want it NOW because we see
others have had it changed, it CAN be done
and we are told we are not the exception
Keep coming back does not quiet the impatience
All in Gods Time, (not mine)
(I keep saying this, I think its gonna be the title
of my first song!?)
Sometimes inventory needs retaking
and retaking
and retaking
on certain life areas
(Step4 & then ongoing Step10's)
Works
Taking responsibility
having faith
Prayer
Allow Willingness, Action and Patience to drive you
The only thing instant in AA is the coffee
And 20-30 years of insanity will not be fixed in 2 or 3 or 4
However it amazing and all areas are being sorted and resorted
improved and improved
The best is yet to come
So while your still healing
Have a little patience
Take That - Patience
Tuesday, September 04, 2007
H.A.L.T. its essential - and it helps others if we practice it
Bowl of chicken soup
Chat with a newcomer
Hot Orange juice, with bits
freshly squeezed lemon
and a huge spoon of honey
heated up
EAArly night
I slept last night 9 solid hours!
H.A.L.T.
I woke up this morning
a completely different woman
Yeh its that Powerful, almost unrecognisable....
No seriously
Completely different state of mind
still have the snot, more in fact
but the rest of me is like 100%
so I can deal with the snotty nose!
I shared it in my homegroup tonight
and 4 people come up after
and said yeh I need an early night too
one said its like am frightened of missing something
dont know what, which reminded me of this post
H.A.L.T applies
especially when life is unmanageable, confusing
and everything seems a big deal
H.A.L.T applies
especially when life gets big and amazing
and manageable and there seems to be no big deals
Its easy to forget
maintenence includes
Steps and Prayers
food and sleep
anger management
connecting with
working with others
H.A.L.T when practiced, turns me into a patient
tolerent, kind, forgiving, loving, willing, focussed human
It also opens me up to be mmore
receptive to my Higher Power's will
Also helps me turn up for work, able to function & focus
Also helps me not bat an eye lid at the 72 hour tube strike
From my flat there is more than one way to get to work!!
Which is helpful to those around me
Good night
Chat with a newcomer
Hot Orange juice, with bits
freshly squeezed lemon
and a huge spoon of honey
heated up
EAArly night
I slept last night 9 solid hours!
H.A.L.T.
I woke up this morning
a completely different woman
Yeh its that Powerful, almost unrecognisable....
No seriously
Completely different state of mind
still have the snot, more in fact
but the rest of me is like 100%
so I can deal with the snotty nose!
I shared it in my homegroup tonight
and 4 people come up after
and said yeh I need an early night too
one said its like am frightened of missing something
dont know what, which reminded me of this post
H.A.L.T applies
especially when life is unmanageable, confusing
and everything seems a big deal
H.A.L.T applies
especially when life gets big and amazing
and manageable and there seems to be no big deals
Its easy to forget
maintenence includes
Steps and Prayers
food and sleep
anger management
connecting with
working with others
H.A.L.T when practiced, turns me into a patient
tolerent, kind, forgiving, loving, willing, focussed human
It also opens me up to be mmore
receptive to my Higher Power's will
Also helps me turn up for work, able to function & focus
Also helps me not bat an eye lid at the 72 hour tube strike
From my flat there is more than one way to get to work!!
Which is helpful to those around me
Good night
Monday, September 03, 2007
H.A.L.T.
Hungry
Angry
Lonely
Tired
I heard this in very early days
And regularly use this most days
It touches on it in the book Living Sober
Clancy touches on it in his tapes too
How it works on me is
If/when I am
resenftul
afraid
Paranoid
miserable
suspicious
comparing myself with others
not wanting to do anything
unwilling
impatient
lustful
afraid
envious
jealous
full of self will
projecting
mindreading
gazing into space
feeling not good enough
not liking you
feeling hard done by
the worlds against me
thinging everybody else is at fault
believing everybody else is at fault
feeling disconnected from myself and others
Then I look at H.A.L.T
When did I last eat? Am I hungry ?
am I angry, resentful, not accepting of something?
Am I lonely, feeling misunderstood, nobody loves me ?
Am I getting enough rest ? Quality ? Consistently ?
usually one of those is needed to be dealt with
Some people have major angry and lonely attacks
I used to have lonely attacks
for me nowadays I watch for hungry and tired
If I am one or both or all four
I will start pointing fingers
or getting miserable, poor me
and everything starts to become a big deal
my thinking, perception and intuition becomes skewed
and I become less able to function in my usual
relatively sane! way
Solution = be honest = take action
HUNGRY
If I havent eaten enough so far - EAT
Good food not junk, and its quality not quantity
ANGRY
If angry, resntful, not accepting of something -
Check you when you last ate and how your much rest you are getting
If you are new, SPEAK with another alky/Sponsor
If know how to take inventory
Take inventory, pray, help a newcomer REPEAT if necessary
Post inventory, if still unsure what problem is
or what to pray for speak with sponsor,
or another responsible alky for counsel
LONELY
Check when you last ate (see above) if you are tired (see below)
are you afraid or something coming up
Are you feeling misunderstood
If you are new, SPEAK with another alky/Sponsor
Go to a meeting
Go for coffee after
Call up someone and ask them how they are ?
Call up someone and say "I am feeling lonely"
CALL up someone else and ask them how they are
Go to a meeting
Pray and chat with HP/God, like you would a wise gentle friend
TIRED
When did you last rest ?
Are you resentful, afraid, not accepting of something?
Put your feet up and snooze
Go to bed early today
and go to bed early again tomorrow
repeat as often as possible
Preferabley after having eaten enough each day
resentments, fear, defects are exhausting in themselves
to carry round...speak with sponsor, take inventory
Ok am off, very tired and am beginning to feel miserable
and lonely and........ AM JUST TIRED!!
The suns still up
and I am going to bed!
Practicing H.A.L.T enables the restraint of tongue and pen tool
not practicing H.A.L.T can lead to destruction of the innocent
Good night
Angry
Lonely
Tired
I heard this in very early days
And regularly use this most days
It touches on it in the book Living Sober
Clancy touches on it in his tapes too
How it works on me is
If/when I am
resenftul
afraid
Paranoid
miserable
suspicious
comparing myself with others
not wanting to do anything
unwilling
impatient
lustful
afraid
envious
jealous
full of self will
projecting
mindreading
gazing into space
feeling not good enough
not liking you
feeling hard done by
the worlds against me
thinging everybody else is at fault
believing everybody else is at fault
feeling disconnected from myself and others
Then I look at H.A.L.T
When did I last eat? Am I hungry ?
am I angry, resentful, not accepting of something?
Am I lonely, feeling misunderstood, nobody loves me ?
Am I getting enough rest ? Quality ? Consistently ?
usually one of those is needed to be dealt with
Some people have major angry and lonely attacks
I used to have lonely attacks
for me nowadays I watch for hungry and tired
If I am one or both or all four
I will start pointing fingers
or getting miserable, poor me
and everything starts to become a big deal
my thinking, perception and intuition becomes skewed
and I become less able to function in my usual
relatively sane! way
Solution = be honest = take action
HUNGRY
If I havent eaten enough so far - EAT
Good food not junk, and its quality not quantity
ANGRY
If angry, resntful, not accepting of something -
Check you when you last ate and how your much rest you are getting
If you are new, SPEAK with another alky/Sponsor
If know how to take inventory
Take inventory, pray, help a newcomer REPEAT if necessary
Post inventory, if still unsure what problem is
or what to pray for speak with sponsor,
or another responsible alky for counsel
LONELY
Check when you last ate (see above) if you are tired (see below)
are you afraid or something coming up
Are you feeling misunderstood
If you are new, SPEAK with another alky/Sponsor
Go to a meeting
Go for coffee after
Call up someone and ask them how they are ?
Call up someone and say "I am feeling lonely"
CALL up someone else and ask them how they are
Go to a meeting
Pray and chat with HP/God, like you would a wise gentle friend
TIRED
When did you last rest ?
Are you resentful, afraid, not accepting of something?
Put your feet up and snooze
Go to bed early today
and go to bed early again tomorrow
repeat as often as possible
Preferabley after having eaten enough each day
resentments, fear, defects are exhausting in themselves
to carry round...speak with sponsor, take inventory
Ok am off, very tired and am beginning to feel miserable
and lonely and........ AM JUST TIRED!!
The suns still up
and I am going to bed!
Practicing H.A.L.T enables the restraint of tongue and pen tool
not practicing H.A.L.T can lead to destruction of the innocent
Good night
Living in the SOLUTION not the problem
10th March 2006 Mum died after breast, bladder & lung cancer and it inspired last years "walk" at Blackheath Common,SE London. This year THE RAIN HELD off til the afternoon WAY HAY!! A workout warm up, a minutes silence to remember... lots of walking, talking and an icecream at the finish.
The primary purpose of this walk... Cancer is still a disabler and a killer & search for that prevention and cure is still a something we would all like. I raced for anyone anywhere who needs it, but with a few people in mind that I know, or are close to people I know.
WE that hundreds of women this year over many races and walks and events, one primary purpose.
Today, am very grateful
that inspite of losing my mum to cancer
The AA pledge inspired me to see and accept
that it was due to research
funds already collected in previous years
that helped find the treatment for my mum 3 times
without this treatment
she would not have seen me get sober
she would not have had me make amends
she would not have seen me happier than she had ever seen me
(her words)
Without AA and the Steps
I would not have had the best relationship
we had ever had for about 12 months
and I would not be feeling the way I do
and giving freely, being part of a great whole
EGOless almost
so that someone else may get this chance too
What do I get out of it
I get to heal from my grief a little more
Recovery in all my affairs
Every £ counts towards it all
Its not how much I raised
Its how much WE raised together
Just by putting one foot in front of the other
and Keeping on Keeping on
AA's thats newer and older & God
YOU the great YOU did this to me
Part of this amazing life saving and giving fellowship
YOU PLEASE feel proud!!
I humbly thank you
And if you dont feel you know me
But have taken anything from this blog
(which is simply my experience and
the experience and tools, others have passed on to me)
and used it and or passed it on
to try and help someone
Feel proud!
And if you have used anything
anyone in AA has passed on to you
to stay sober
and or try to help someone
Feel proud!
And if you have tried to stay sober today
Just for today
Please feel proud!
and give it another go tomorrow
in doing so, you are helping others
Proud to be a recovering alcoholic in AA
(Proud but not smug)
This ones for YOU the great YOU yes YOU
Proud - Heather Small
Keep it Simple
Serenity Prayer
God Grant us the Serenity
To Accept the things we cannot change
Courage to change the things we Can
And wisdom to know the difference
AA Pledge
"I am responsible ...
When anyone, anywhere, reaches out for help,
I want the hand of A.A. always to be there.
And for that, I am responsible."
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)