The day after - racing round the edge of the hole in the sand

I felt a huge wave of loss
stuff like
babies
pregnancy
mum (mine)
intimacy
what is it
what isnt it
why
why not
relationship
fiction and real
and blurred edges
why
why not
Hows it all feel?

Cried myself to sleep
hasnt happened for a while
need to happen
it happened

Conversation with God
is like loooking into the eyes
of an owl 12 inches away
I cant lie to it
it looks right into my soul
and knows whats going on
it dont say a word
it doesnt need to
even when I dont or wont look
It has a way of loosening the denial
even when I dont know there is any
then its my job to do some work



She held her own an awesome prescence!!