12 years

Today I am 12
Higher Power
Fellowship
Steps
Willingness
Anylengths
Grateful

Say it

After the resentment
After the anger
Just get it past your teeth
Let go of the outcome
Don't be silenced
No one has the right to the power
To stop me being me
Don't join in the lie
Or the Truth

Bread of Life

Baking bread
has always been something
someone else did
complicated
hit and miss
a faff with ingredients
need a breadmaker
why bother
I don't eat that  much bread
The other week
I ate soda bread made with love
made with sharing in mind
it was so tasty
so easy she said
I went home
had a go
and it was strange
and I almost gave up hope
But then instead of trying
it with different flour
which she had also given me instructions for
I bought the same flour
which she had used
and a different make of buttermilk
and the result was astonishing
added raisins and sultanas
tasted yummy
and I ate it all over a period of a week
no after effects as with bought bread
no matter how 'posh'
always after effects
Something new to learn
and get excited about
I shared it this week
and they said it was tasty
I have the ingredients to give it a go again
different extras this time
Rosemary and Olives
So easy
no proving required !!
Bread of Life

Disunity Kills

Today I wept for lack of unity
Today my values were overruled
Today I feel powerless
Today I feel silenced
Today my voice for the voiceless was shut down
Today my efforts to rebalance an imbalance was destroyed
Today I feel like quitting again
Today the differences are unacceptable
Today I feel the spiritual kick which others will feel later
Today I feel hurt
Today I fear the hurt others will feel
Today I feel we could have done better together
Today we could have put on a united front
Today we could have helped the cause
Today we prepare for tomorrow
Today can make a difference for tomorrow
Today I wept in disbelief at shortsightedness
Today I wept at selfishness
Today I wept at couldn't carelessness
Today I wept at perceived consequences
Today I feel physically sick
Today I feel angry
Today I feel afraid
Today I wept for others
Today I wept for myself
Today I wept for unknowns
Today I wept for bloodymindedness
Today I wept for evil streaks
Today I wept for Spiritual Warfare
Today I wept for spiritual sickness
Today I wept for the unnecessaryness of it all
Today I wept because I don't understand
Today I wept because I get no answers
Today I wept I believe through the eyes of our maker

Tracks

When you are driven
by something
that you can't explain
which fills your within
and colours all your without
you just have to do it
FullFillment even for a second

Woman and 4 camels
walk across Australia
nature showed no mercy
nature just was

It was what it was
a long trek
which she did not know
exactly what would happen

people just came and took photos
she eventually was hounded by them
a journalist
eventually got her drift

At one with the elements
even if the elements
would destroy
and give life

Whatever happened
have sufficient
water and shelter
and keep walking

How much more formal education is enough?

When I think of how many years I have left
in 'work' I have to ask
do I really want to spend them
writing essays
to obtain qualifications?

I certainly know that educarion
Boosts confidence
that I am on the right tracks
Gives a richness to what I do

Which way to go... next
The path has 3 strands to it,,,
I feel like I am running out of time
here on earth

Trust... walk on
Trust that nothing goes to waste
trust... and let go of the outcome

             

keeping on

Its all abit different these days
A new freedom has come upon me
In the last month or so
another layer off the onion

God has led me into the desert
And the temptations have been upon me
The Spiritual Tool kit works
in extreme's

I've been to the edge
and there was no drink to be seen
no drink to get drunk on
just the edge and two choices

which is the most dangerous
at the edge with no drink
or at the edge with a drink to get drunk on
three choices

unfamiliar territory
in God land
had now become familiar
time to enjoy

relationships
its all about
relationships
communication
understanding

and hills
which hills to climb
which hills to climb and knowingly be slain on
which to climb in search of the promised land

Sober and grateful
time to find and maintain
the gratitude
smile and enjoy life

I can not be as serious as
2014/2015
bring back the uncontrollable laughter
in amongst lifes challenges

Half alive is not an option any more
Right size the fire extinguishers
Keep on asking, waiting, listening and doing
Just 'kin do it

Sunshine

Today the sun is shining
And I am working inside
I can see the sea
and the sun is warm on my body

Help me relax into
working at home
and not clamour for the outside
Sunshine

Help me not resent
that I am working
while its sunny
and enjoy what is

Help me enjoy
the blessings
notice and seek out
the blessings
in everything again

Help me see more blessings
in everything
I seem to have become
lost the ability to hold onto gratitude
and for it to penetrate deeper
than a few seconds