Tuesday, November 08, 2005

ISM.... I Sabotage Myself

didnt hear the alarm
didnt get up when i heard it
did listen to my head
didnt eat
didnt get to the garage
didnt get to work on time
didnt get a lunch time
didnt finish my work
didnt get to the meeting on time

did pray for a sober day
did pray for the people i was angry at
did get enough work done
did keep my mind with my body most of the day
did get someone elses done aswell
did get to meeting
did get voted in for a commitment
did fing out about a convention in Europe coming up
did notice this same location has come up in
several very different conversations over the last 2 weeks...
did have a laugh at meeting
did stay for food
did meet a newcomer
did pray for a safe ride home & have defects removed along the way
did get home safe
did call up my sponsor
did get honest about my fear & unmamageability in the mornings
did take on a suggestion
did express gratitude for being asked to secretary another mtng
did get honest about my doubts
did wonder together if I may be taking on too
many commitments around the fellowship
did agree to pray on it
did talk to a friend & listened to her gratitude
did stay sober

will pray before bed
will write a simple plan for the morning
will try

I am grateful for all the dids
I am grateful that my unmanageablility didnt destroy today
I am grateful for accepting another imperfect day

If I was drinking
ALL the stuff i DID would not be there

I am blessed to be part of... something greater than me

I am grateful that there is a solution

2 comments:

dudehead said...

Good post. I enjoyed reading it.

I struggle in the mid afternoon kinda like you described in the morning. I am one weirdo that needs his HP. Have a good one.

dh

Trudging said...

Hey I have been there and done all of that. The big thing is you stayed sober.