My Mothers a Superhero

We, in our turn, sought the same escape with all the desperation of drowning men. What seemed at first a flimsy reed, has proved to be the loving and powerful hand of God. A new life has been given us or, if you prefer, "a design for living" that really works. P28

It is a design for living that works in rough going. P15

My mum went into hospital for tests friday
today she was diagnosed with lung cancer
Its her third time, breast, bladder, now lung
she texted me the other day
"you have to be brave to want to grow old"
how true is that

When I told my family today, they just kept asking
why her, how much more can she cope with ?
I just could say, its her, because she can cope
and she will keep going until she is ready to stop
so we just keep going aswell

Am grateful today

that I am sober
part of a loving fellowship
that i was able to tell my mum i loved her
that i had a meeting to get to
that i could say no to doing a chair tomorrow
that i didnt expect to much of myself today
that i went back to basics
HALT, praying, meetings, talking, step10 ing

that i can cry & not feel sorry for myself
that i am able to feel emotional like a human being
that i am not the emotional cripple i used to be
that I can behave appropriately without hiding my pain
that I can take suggestions from newcomers
that i notice, my pride kicking in

that i was able to make my amends to my mum last year
that my mum and i regularly communicate nowadays
that I have had a few years now of loving this woman
for who she is, not what I would like her to be
that i can accept that although she is "our mum"
to me and my brother, she is "our mum" to a number of people
to accept she is a remarkable woman
My mothers a Superhero

Your job now is to be at the place where you may be of maximum helpfulness to others, so never hesitate to go anywhere if you can be helpful. P102

I need to get myself in fit spiritual, physical & mental condition
Even though I have come down friday with an odd chest complaint
almost like i came out in sympathy!?!?!

Tomorrow, she will have brain & full body scans & biopsy
to see if its spread & what type it is
tomorrow we find out what the next step is

Keep on, keeping on
My job is to do the next right thing
Gods will, not Johnos

What happens next, depends on which way she wants to go
I want to be there to help her do it with dignity

Grateful for my Higher Power
Grateful for the strength of the fellowship
Grateful for the strength of bloggers
Grateful for the "kit of spiritual tools" p25
Grateful for Sponsors everywhere

God doesnt give us more than we can handle...
I have faith

All page ref's to Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous