Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Step Seven - broke my sulk! choice sulk or practice humility

I was reading step 7 in 12 x 12 last night
and realised I have been sulking
and blaming someone
for my financial insicurity
yes yes I have lots of justifyable reasons
why Its not fair
but the truth is
I am the miserable one and I am creating
and atmosphere because
of my attitude
I am in a situation where
I continue to continue sulking
OR have faith that Gods plan for me will
not club me to death at the beach
I have no idea
what He thinks or whats in store
but so far
he's been good to me
VERY good in fact brilliant

So by the time I re-read 12 x 12 step 7
this morning at 6.30am
to do a chair at early meeting...
getting up was not such a challenge this time
I already knew
practicing humility
and trusting that its all
really happening the way it should be
and its time that i let go of this
selfish, self seeking, selfcenteredness, sulking
and self will in predicting that
I know this thing is a DELIBERATE attempt
to sabotage my pleasure ... err know I dont know this
in fact I know the circumstances
and its not true, its a desperate measure taken by someone
which has nothing to do with me ATALL
so I should mind my own business
and get on with whats in front of me
my job is to be of maximum helpfulness
whether I think or not
so my sulk was broken
managed to go shopping before work
and get there on time
and feel good
today was a good day

Moving happening
taking steps
get things transferred on correct days
accepting not everything has to be done
on exactly that day
first things first!
Prioritize!
phone broadband railfare tv licence
re direct mail and a couple of other things
the rest can wait abit longer...
Progress not perfection

Heres my moral dilemma for today...
I am moving in 10 days time
The hinge came loose on your toilet seat
a week ago
and even though I have "fixed" it
its not going to hold!
would you
a) buy a new one
b) tell her and offer to pay a contribution to a new one
and let her choose
c) leave the lid down with a "post-it" note on the underside
saying,sorry and becareful!
d) bodge it and not sit down on it for 10 days, say nothing
knowing its going to bug your conscience for the next 10 days
and make your life unmanageable...!

I will leave you with that one
while I remain
"impaled on the horns of a young dilemma"
Quote by Stephen Fry
a little longer

3 comments:

steveroni said...

Without a doubt, a) buy a new one...
Was that a trick question? -grin-

Syd said...

I would replace the toilet seat. They are pretty cheap. Not worth having anxiety over.

Lydia said...

Come on by my blog today (Wed.) to celebrate my sobriety anniversary, which I also addressed in the post previous to today.

While I got a laugh out of (c) I think that (b) is your best choice. Be sure to let her know that you've "fixed" it before.

It's all good, in varying degrees.
Prioritizing is a great idea for getting through the next weeks!