Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Grateful & reality check

Grateful to have been "successful"
that I get to stay in my job
reality check
as to how serious this crunch is

Monday Lehmans
closed up and havent paid anyone...

I think..

which puts my potential
1 months and 2 weeks redundancy
in perspective
at least I had time
yeh I can analyse away and say
well it would have been this and that

I feel
relief
sadness
gladness
the hard work
starts here!
Life goes on!

Its all going to get smaller
which in my opinion
is needed
helping others
a sense of community
one vision
the greater good
fairness and profitable

yeh its easy to get attached
secure
afraid
human
whats the option
dont do anything...

no.
engaging
brings taking part
being part of
cant help feel
insecure
when its in jeopardy

Its ok knowing
not to get attached
and I suppose its
easy when
you arent taking part
to say it
it just to say
well I dont get attached to work
and then feel really afraid of losing
from another part of our lives

if you havent felt a sense of loss
or something like that
when somethings gone or over
then it dont seem
like you really had it in the first place
or didnt give it your all?

What am I on about? I dunno
talking out a resentment I have towards
myself for feeling ANY attachement
however small towards my job!
how intolerence can I be towards myself for gods sake !

I suppose I am justifying
all this stuff
that I hear about
not getting attached
loose garments
let go and let God

I suppose its about
getting involved
but not making the thing, job, money
person, course, house, sea
my higher power?

do you know what I am on about?
It dont matter

I am grateful
tomorrow I go to work
I have extra responsibility from next week
which was inevitable
as we will be a third down
and a chance to learn something new
and I get paid next week!!

head can return to house move by the sea
and uni...
unless there is something else?

3 comments:

AlkySeltzer said...

Still here. It's a great way to tell a story, one short line at a time!

You sound so positive, midst all the crunching and gnashing of numbers. Be back tomorrow.

indistinct said...

"It's all going to get smaller"

We won't survive if, as a species, we keep crying for more. Come to think of it, that's been the storey of my life. More.

I'm glad AA is right sizing me. I don't need more. I just need to like what I have.

I'm also glad your still at work. We've downsized several times at work and are now facing another one. The incredible shrinking work place.

One day at a time.

Hank

An Irish Friend of Bill said...

'same sh*t, different day', as someone i know used to say...

hheheh
nothing changes really. ups and downs of life!