Monday, February 25, 2008

Full of it - High SpirIT, Holy SpirIT, Fellowship of the SpirIT, what is it ? I dunno but I like IT

Is such an amazing thing
I feel on fire (for you clearly!)
physically I am NOT on top form
Doing the basics
Keeping on keeping on
Spiritually fit

Talking to newcomer, being a fellow within a great fellowship
Being there for a friend amongst friends
Being a worker amongst workers
Asking for help myself in the right places
A good day really

I have eaten
it hasnt all gone my way today
I havent taken it as a deliberate attempt to sabotage
the peace I have
I haven been tempted to
I did start off on the wrong foot with my colleague
but again shut my mouth... restraint of tongue
she did the same
and it passed
see I know that its not all about me
other people get tired and irritable aswell
We both thawed out just before lunch and laughed
sense of humour returned
passed that laughter on
we get to keep what we have by giving it away
that means humour too

If someone has made you smile today
Its a gift to pass on at the earliest time possible
well thats my story and I'm sticking to it!!
Its what happened today anyway @)

Also realised that its not my job to jump in
and save people like I want to
or for them to save me either
sometimes we have to feel some pain and fear
and grind not because we want to, just because
sometimes it comes with living life instead of hiding
under or inside the sofa
and this is at times what anylengths feels like
having to do it day after day
an anylengths not of our choosing
or not what we are used to
and not always leading to the results we would have liked
BUT DOING IT ANYWAY cos it is the next right thing
AND getting up again and turning up to give it another go tomorrow
and see it through, try the tools out,
test them out, on the hard stuff
this IS where you see how REALLY good these tools are
its all practicing
and possibly you get love and feel the joy when as and when it passes
or just the relief even!
and look back and think
Blimey God if we can get through this
then anythings possible!

Anylengths is not allowing self will to run riot
Anylengths is facing fear
Anylengths is doing what we have to do no matter what
on any given day
Anylengths is also knowing when to stop and lay down
given your current health etc etc

Soo I am going to stop now
I am well on track
knackered and wondering exactly
how I am going to keep working and do this degree
I am not doubting the way forward study wise
Its the way forward
Its the rest of my "life"
what am I to do?

God please show me how to do this
and what to do
Cos I am beginning to wonder myself
the decisions I am contemplating
you know what they are...
what am I to do?
please show me
I dont know whats absurd and what isnt here
they all seem common sense to me AT THE MOMENT!
Give me some direction please
She said on her knees humbly

God bless everyone I have a resentment for
In private I will name them individually
God please grant me some patience, pity and tolerence for x
that I would cheerfully grant a sick friend
When x offends me
God Please remind me, he/she is a sick man/woman
God save me from being angry, thy will be done

God Please help me NOT to retaliate
I would NOT treat sick people this way
God Please grant me restraint of tongue and pen and email

God Please remove my fear around (whatever/whoever) it is
and direct my attention to what you would have me be

God please remove my defects of character... name them!

ok of to do prayers and inventory

For those going through it at the moment
The darkest hours is before the dawn ALWAYS!
sometimes that dark hour goes on for longer than 60 minutes
but the dawn always breaks eventually

Dont quit before the miracle
Minute by minute
hour by hour
morning then afternoon and then the evening
Cinch by the inch, hard by the yard
Easy does it
But Just 'uckin do it

Good night

Thank you God
Another sober day
with no desire to drink
and a big desire for life
what you got on for me tomorrow big Guy?

IT is Love
and Love is
Trudging this road in Unity
Unity is Together
Together is in Fellowship


molly said...

i have enjoyed waking up lately with the wonder of what's in store.. at seven months laughter has slowly returned - it's amazing really.

you sound really good :)

the hubby is hilarious with his new yoga practice. i shouldn't have fed him beans for supper i'll just tell ya that my friend.


hey - i picked up "peace is every step" and pema's "when things fall apart" - enjoying them both. :)

Syd said...

Wonderful stuff Johno. And I like that you bless those for whom you have a resentment. You are an inspiration.

Ingenue, Interrupted said...

"Anylengths is not allowing self will to run riot
Anylengths is facing fear
Anylengths is doing what we have to do no matter what
on any given day
Anylengths is also knowing when to stop and lay down
given your current health etc etc"

A big resounding YES my girl! This is what I am working on right now. I'm starting small, cleaning daily when I don't feel like it lol! Practicing yoga when my ego wants me to waste that time instead. Not smoking cigarettes when my addiction tells me too...

Everything sounds exciting over there. Nice that we're having so much fun, yeah?

xoxoxo Ingenue