Tuesday, April 22, 2008

I wish I had self restraint on blogging

when I get the cahnce I do it
when I dont have it
it isnt so bad

Finally had a chat with guy at work
regarding AA
simple chat
gave him newcomer pack and meeting directory

said my boss who is also his boss
is very supportive and understanding
when I told her about AA and alcoholism
as I understand it in me

said I would be happy to with him
to a meeting if he needed
and would recommend some if needed to

Also made it clear that the decision
now is his
I will not push it
not because I dont care
simply because its now up to him

said to AA is not the only resource
for alcoholism, but its the only one
which I have found made sense
and made any lasting difference to me

also suggested he try a few meetings
and not judge AA on one meeting
and go perhaps not thinking he is an alky
simply to speak with those who
know they are and see what happens
after a reasonable period of time
he may find he is or may find he isnt

either way he will have made a few friends
and have a found a resource he may end up
recommending to some one else
even if he doesnt find us useful himself

he seemed ok with all that
even looked in the directory
and pointed out to me a local meeting to him

Time to let go now
and
remember my primary purpose at work
is to support the people I am paid to support
I am no-ones pysch, trainer, manager or life coach...
keep it simple

I still have no desire to arrive on time at 9am to work
I did arrive at work at 8.55am today
I will continue to pray for
the willingness to have my
attitude towards 9am starts changed

Football may be off
some ladies dropped out
not sure yet
its all getting a bit political!?

Studying is really hard
I have no confidence in my understanding
I feel like I haven't got this semester atall
and am feeling really odd
and afraid, though not terrified
I am willing to accept a fail
though I am afraid of how I will react
more faith
less projecting
get on with studying in the present
its really random dude!

study as you can
not as you cant!

Friend who is sick
Thinking of her often
not sure what i am to do
carry on as I am
and wait and let go
not in a victim or defeatest way
without thinking the worst or full of hope
just let go and remain balanced
neutral, in the middle ground
as much as possible
and get on with whats in front of me
instead of what isnt
this is not entirely what I want to do
but it seems its what I need to do
I dont know what I dont know
this is a new experience
and it seems there are no rules
Its all unfamiliar
whatever
She has that Jesus fella
Sponsor, a heap of experts
lots of experience
in life
all i know to do is
wait patiently
not easy though
Love her in my thoughts and prayers
and on my blog
so I am
and thanks to you, I refuse to ever watch
walking with dinosaurs again
I have been traumatised for life!!
and no I wont pray for them!
But this is for you...

I am Lovin' the spring warmth
we are being graced with
Thank you God

No comments: