I have been trying really hard to
well not that hard really
just trying or expecting it cos I believe its what I should feel
but I cant ... I cant sit in self pity
I am grateful cos I am not really
anything when am full of it!
and it takes ages to climb out
I have reached a level of acceptance
and am accepting thats exactly how its meant to be
The devastation, sulking
has NOT reared up
and I even laughed at it all today
without having to talk it out
with a few
just you
and one other
and God
yes I am want it all MY WAY
I know its not possible
and its not aftecting every area of my life
Still ate, worked, laughed, did the right things
Home group was coool tnite
Good to be back
trying to live in the solution is the easier softer way
battling with what I cant have is not
I prayed more than twice for the pair of them
to have everything I could possibly wish for myself
and more than twice for each of them just incase...
they are sick like me!
whatever, I feel better for it :)
thanks for ALL your comments guys and gals
I appreciate all your xperience
its what I need to hear
day 1 of 14
continue to pray for those I am resentful at
have a good weekend
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