Friday, August 05, 2005

HP & God unite

I stopped of on the offchance that a person from my passed wold be in a shop where she worked once & she was there...she isnt usually at that time (HP stuff)

She was just the same, brimming with Alpha course confidence, I must go here, I must go there isnt God wonderful etc etc, just the same as she was 18 years ago, the last time GOD was in a conversation we had. For me her Christian God, is too complicated, I have to do alot of work to understand it as intensley as she does & I am not prepared to do that, courses etc etc. For me It is truly a Power Greater than myself that keeps me sober & helps me live the life I do & thats enough for now. To see how her faith touches her and animates her face, is enough for me to see that it works for her & for that I am grateful, a little hesistant but grateful.

This time though instead of being afraid of my lack of knowledge & fear of conversion, I was able to tell her I had found a Higher Power of my understanding that works for me. We both agreed that its a wonderful feeling to feel we are part of something, to be looked after.

Today, I felt a huge sense of progress, fitting in, Live & let live. This woman, although her faith is different in ways to mine, her common thing is helping others & it works, as she does alot of good work in the community. Its like me letting of the fact that people in AA stay sober without doing the steps & they are their own way. Just accepting that Its not an attack on the way I do it, because they do it different, its just different, same result, happy, useful, fulfilled, just different thats all.

Service is the key, its a common theme of the happy, joyeus & free.

"Give freely of what you find and join us. We shall be with you in the Fellowship of the Spirit, and you will surely meet some of us as you trudge the Road of Happy Destiny"
P164 Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous

This isnt meant as a debate to analyse what God is, its just my observation for myself, thats all.

Had lunch in a cafe with more old people than I have seen in ages, a strange thought popped into my head. I wonder what these people would be wearing 60 years ago? How many of them would be in uniform, smoking woodbines, swapping cigarettes & nylons etc. How many would be reading out the letters from their loved ones.

I have lots of love for the "oldies" in the world & as my lunch buddy said, you are only old on the outside. Inside you are still young. I am grateful for what they did for us, the example of cammaradery, like fellowship in those times, they all had a common theme "war" they were all in the same boat, so they shared ideas, food, tissues etc to get through it & they did. Its great.

Like I said strange thought, but a lovely thought, am grateful for those that trod that path before me, without them I wouldnt have the life I live now. They shaped history.

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